You Can't Coach Fat

Finally, I have mailed paperwork for The English

2009-10-20T00:09:00.004+01:00

The paperwork has been mailed. Within a day or two, the USCIS California Service Center should receive our thorough an polite request for a K1 visa for Duncan. You can see the time line here, but in sum, it looks like about 7-9 months. We might get lucky and go a little faster, but since average processing time for the first portion is about 5 months, I'm trying to be realistic.

The total package contains 103 pages and is neatly bound and tabbed in a blue Acco folder. It contains photos, forms, copies of forms, redacted emails, Facebook screenshots, Skype conversations, professional histories, a birth certificate, financial and travel records, receipts, hand-written letters and even a picture of my ring.

I hope our reviewers find us witty, but I suspect not. Generally, I live in fear of getting the wrong reviewer who will cite us on a minor detail that I left out that will continue the delays. I cannot imaging what this process must be like for someone who doesn't speak English and/or doesn't have the benefit of the type of work I have done in the past. VisaJourney.com has been a huge help to us.

What the hell took you so long to file?

We were engaged by the end of July (though made no announcement until it was clear that Mom would find out from us and not, say, Facebook), but The English had to update his official documents, and some items required signatures. Arguably, I should have reviewed the documents while in the UK, but in the end, we kept finding new things that had to be signed instead of emailed or faxed. Then we had the Sheep Incident, where we learned that Customs does not accept packages that make sheep noises and are presumably unable to discern the hopeful bleating of Shaun the Sheep toys (and the soft rustle of our visa paperwork with them) from hostile intent. Part of the documents were carried by a friend from London to Seattle and the remainder ended up neatly folded in a Diwali card which took over TWO WEEKS to arrive in the US, though normal air mail takes only 2-4 days. The card was square and presumably USPS can't auto-sort it. Sixteen days of hope-and-dismay at the mailbox.

FAQ

Can't you just get married and th--? Yes, but the wait would be longer.
Can The English come here while you wait? No.
Can you work from the UK? Unlikely.
When will you see him again? Probably after Christmas.
How about Canada? He can live and work in Canada, but his jobs are in London.
What if he gets a job here? If you want to hire him, please feel free.
Did you use an attorney? I spoke to an attorney, but it was expensive, and most of the time I spent was gathering info. When the greencard bits happen, we'll probably hire someone to finish the process.
How much did it cost? $455 for the application, and we've spent a couple hundred more on passport photos, printouts and shipping.
Did you include the engagement story? No. You can make a deal with The English if you want to hear it.
"I have a friend/coworker/neighbor who married a foreigner, and they..." It's been helpful to hear others' experiences, but many people you know probably a)got married before 2001, or b)were already on a work or student visa when they got engaged. Maybe I could find an attorney that could cut off a few weeks, but what I've read and the attorney I spoke to indicate that we are on the right path. Optimally, The English gets a job here that sponsors him on a work visa, but the odds of that happening are very low. I would gladly work in London for a year, but all my clients are here (plus my previous client had about all of me they could take), and it's hard to keep building out a practice from London. Then again, any London start-ups who want to hire me: I am exceedingly clever and an important component of your organisation, and you want to hire me starting in January.

Feel free to ask more questions and/or check the previous post for other questions.

Ah, romance...How to Import a Husband

2009-08-18T22:29:00.002+01:00

I'm marrying an Englishman. In fact, I refer to him as The English because he is THAT English. Only K2 is more English. I have listened to them discuss tea.

I don't know when we will marry, other than "as soon as we can." Having made up my mind, I'm not interested in goofing around planning an elaborate wedding (since I worked catering about a million and seven of them while in college). Unfortunately, The US Government has to validate our nuptials.

Behold--a set of Frequently Asked Questions.

Are you moving to the UK or is he moving here?
The English is moving here, we hope.

Would you have gotten married if he could just live here?
Hell, yes. And I'll move there, if it comes to that.

Can't you just get married and then bring him here as your husband?
We could, but the process to get his permanent resident status would take much longer.

Where are you getting married?
We will get legally married in the US.

When are you getting married?
We don't know.

When will he be back in the US?
We don't know. It may be possible to enter the US during the visa process, but it's not recommended, and his visa interview must be done in the UK.

Why don't you know when you're getting married? Is it really *that* hard to get a visa if you're getting married?
He is a British citizen. Before we get married, we have to file for what is known as a K1 or "fiance" visa. Yes, it's tedious and expensive because USCIS has to look out for things like this: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/feedarticle/8573486.

What's the process for getting the visa?
Before we file for the K1, we both need to make sure we are administratively set--passports and driver's licenses are up-to-date, etc. We started this process in August, and it'll take 4-6 weeks to complete, if all goes well with the British government.

The next step is to start the visa process. Getting a visa can take anywhere from 3 months to over a year (or not at all), depending upon how things go. I start by filing I329 forms (which require G325's) and paying $455 to the Department of Homeland Security.

The U.S. Embassy site in the UK recommended allowing 3-4 months from the time the Immigration Center receives my application for the first portion of the visa to process. At that point, my betrothed will start his portion of the process. Feel free to read about it here: http://www.usembassy.org.uk/cons_new/visa/iv/fprocessing.html.
Among other things, he fills out forms, undergoes a medical exam by one of two U.S. Embassy-sanctioned medical centers at a cost of £180 (about the same cost as an uninsured person would pay for a doctor's appointment in the U.S.), presents his (clean, yes) crime record and provides proof that he "is not likely to become a public charge." Unless he manages to get a job and visa from a U.S. company (unlikely), he'll present a notarized affidavit from me guaranteeing that I will financially support him (which I will do happily, since he's giving up London!).

He will then be granted (we hope) a formal interview. He must do the interview at the American Embassy in the UK. Then, we allow several more weeks for processing. If all goes well, we will be issued a K1 visa.

We have 6 months to use the visa and must marry within 90 days of him legally entering the U.S.

So, if everything goes as planned, we might be able to marry in early 2010. Or not.

Are you going to hire an attorney?
We may hire an attorney if it looks like things are going to get hairy. A lot of websites exist that are USA/UK marriage-specific, and reviews are mixed as to whether or not one needs an attorney.

We have recommendations for an attorney here in Seattle.

Can you hire an attorney to make it go faster?
I have not seen anything online in discussion forums indicating you can expedite a K1 visa.

Is it going to be like that movie Greencard?
No, and stop reminding me of Andie MacDowell.

What does the visa application require? Do you have to know everything about each other??
The K1 visa requires that I show I am a U.S. citizen, he is eligible to become a U.S. citizen, and that nothing shady is going on--i.e. we have actually met and really intend to marry. I'm sure some website like www.illegallyimportbridesforprofit.com has a lot of tips and tricks that we don't need. Neither one of us has a criminal record, we have pictures and witnesses of us together, The English has never overstayed a visa, and I make enough money to sponsor an immigrant (>$17,500.00 per year).

And that's it then?
No. After the K1, we have 90 days to apply for his permanent residency status and start another long process so that he can stay and eventually work.

Can he leave the US?
Probably not until he has residency status.

So, now what?
Waiting. Lots of waiting. We won't plan the wedding until we are at least through the first part of the process. Originally we had hoped November, then February, but we really can't tell.

How long until he can work after you're married?
It looks like--and it gets hazy here because I'm more focused on just getting him here--it depends on who hires him and what the work situation will be like. I believe he may be able to start working once he has his conditional permanent resident status. It may be two years before he is legal to work in the U.S.

What if he got an H1 or something?
It might change things some, or it might just be too confusing and jeopardize the process.

Will you have two weddings?
Probably not, and we are not likely to have a big ceremony. It just depends on how things go.

How did he propose?
Classified.

well, did he get down on one knee?
No, nor do I have a diamond ring. It was made clear to The English that a ring is not something I want. I would have worn one if he wanted me to, but it's not really my thing. We will have wedding bands, though.

Are you changing your name?
Hyphenation is under discussion.

Are you excited?
Of course we're excited--in a really long, delayed administrative fashion.

Would You Like to Play a Game?

2009-06-29T21:01:00.002+01:00

Why not play Go, courtesy of the ever-clever Dave Peck?

http://go.davepeck.org/get-going/

Oh, yes, and I'm "back"
Or would that be "I'm gone?" I head to the UK next week for month of rest, remote client work (all done with previous client) and general Limey-taunting. How about a FAQ:

What have you been doing since January? Working. A lot.

Are you still with Atlas?
Yep, and fired up to work with start-ups again.

What client(s) are you working on? I have internal and small client projects for the next month while I gear up for the large engagements (TBD--let me know if you want me to work with you--such things can be arranged).

If you aren't working full-time, what else are you doing?
Putting my life back in order--appointments with dentists, vets, mechanics, sundry advisers and aestheticians. I'm also makign time for things like letter-writing and blog posts.

Are you going to keep your blog again?
I may blog a bit if I do anything interesting, though mostly I plan to go actually spend time in London in the museums/libraries/general history parts and go to Devon/Cornwall. Everything else is pretty much wide open.

Where are you staying?
North London with friends.

Twickenham

2009-01-24T21:59:00.002Z

I'm in the Greater London area for 4-6 weeks. I love England, even though I probably feel more out of place here than anywhere else I've traveled. I think they peg me as an American even before I speak. I'm told it's my hair.

I'll be here for 4-6 weeks (home end of February or early March). Mainly I work, jog and go to the pub. Then I work more. Unlike Portugal, though, I have friends who live here, so I get to hang out in houses and be a normal person from time to time.

And now back to work...

Fund for the two surviving children of Rabbi Gavriel and Rivkah Holtzberg from bombay

2008-12-01T22:48:00.002Z

Posting this link for a friend who spent time with the rabbi's family while celebrating Passover in India.

www.chabadindia.org

in case you wonder why most donation amounts are in multiples of 18...

from about.com

Question: What is the significance of the number 18 in Judaism?
Answer: The word for "life" in Hebrew is "chai." The two Hebrew letters that make up the word "chai" are chet and yud. In Gematria (the numerical value of Hebrew letters), chai is equivalent to 8 and yud is equivalent to 10. So "chai", chet and yud together, equals 18. Giving money in multiples of $18 is symbolic of giving "chai" or life.

I am not in India

2008-11-28T18:22:00.002Z

I received some questions. I'm not in India. My friends are safe, though people are understandably worried. Many of them knew people affected in Mumbai. Think good thoughts for India.

Destination: Arkansas!

2008-10-17T04:47:00.003+01:00

I went from Lisbon to London, and then London to Texas, and now I am in Eureka Springs, AK, known for its--uh--I don't know. I'm here for a wedding that I'm glad to see. I think I might be looking at some antiques tomorrow.

I ended up staying in Lisbon for about two months (minus 5 days in India). I worked many, many hours. Overall, it wasn't too bad, but I was happy to send the team home. They're great peeps, though, and they made a lot of work pass quickly.

I spent a week in the London suburbs wrapping up the Portugal project and getting deeper into the India project. The UK is adorable, and everyone is nice. Maybe they just seem nice because of the accents and constant tea offers, but I really like it there (which is good since I go back on Tuesday).

From the UK, I head back to India for a few days, and then I go back to Seattle after my three weeks-into-three-months business trip.

I'm still here

2008-09-12T20:29:00.002+01:00

I'll be home in October, really. I seem to have a lot of work to do in Lisbon, hence no posts, little email, and it's hard to keep me on IM. I can guarantee I will be back in the USA for Alicia's wedding in October. In the meantime, I'll be working here until this sucker is complete.

No, I'm not home yet.

2008-09-02T00:49:00.003+01:00

I'm still in Lisbon. I left Seattle about a month ago. Since then I've spent a few hours in the London office, several hours in Heathrow, ridden from Mumbai to Pune, India and returned (home?) to Lisbon. I'll come home when they run out of things for me to do.

So, uh, what are you doing?
We're deploying the next version of the software in Lisbon, and I was doing work for another possible rollout in India. The India trip was brief (6 days including travel and the day in London), and we only left the hotel once to go to the customer site on the last day. However, the work parts of it were productive and interesting, and I like my coworkers.

In Lisbon I've been pursuing more or less the same schedule of 8:30-2:30 a couple in-hotel meals and most of the day in the War Suite working. I get out of the hotel for three reasons: jogging along the Rio Tejo, meetings at the customer site every day at 4:30, and a nice dinner OUT OF THE HOTEL. Generally speaking, I am very well-fed and looked after, so the long hours aren't too bad. more importantly, I very much like the team. More later on the fun bits...

"Why American is Great" by Amy

2008-08-31T23:12:00.001+01:00

Salads.

Hey, look--I'm in Portugal

2008-08-08T23:31:00.003+01:00

[Note: This entry is suffering from my serious sleepiness.]

So, as it turns out, India is not my only travel destination. I'm in Lisbon for two weeks to help out the Portugal deployment. Since most of my India project team is in the UK and most of my questions get answered by email anyway, it only made sense for me to come out for a couple weeks and help out when I can (the full Portugal team busted some serious abacaxi here and deserves a break). I'm here for a couple weeks, then I go to London for a day. The same night a few of us head to Mumbai, then drive to Pune for three days of meetings. After that, it's unclear if I will return to Seattle, Lisbon, or London before making a trip to Madrid. It's not as glamourous as it sounds, as it generally means lots of meetings and stuffy rooms full of tech people.

Lisbon is pleasant
We stay in the area along the river near Vasco de Gama Center. The architecture is very modern, and the area was the site of the 98 World Expo. I've spent the bulk of my time working in a suite with some of the project team and the other part at the customer site, though I have had a nice dinner every night. The hotel is nice, and I'm well cared for. Mom, stop worrying.

I hope to see the aquarium (more or less across the street, maybe catch an art museum, and visit something historic. Because the work is pretty heavy, I'm not likely to get to do much touristing, but at least I can eat well.

Now where did I put that metronidazole...

2008-06-27T03:58:00.002+01:00

I've been back from Mumbai for several days now, but a little piece of India decided to come back with me. I don't know if it was the food at the fancy hotel or stuff I ate later in the week, but my stomach's been out-of-whack. It's getting worse daily, and I today I noticed light rash covering my body. I'm assuming whatever it is will not leave without encouragement, so I gave up on letting it run its course and popped some pills.

Mumbai was ok. I didn't do anything exciting. Josh and I hung out and had snacks. I never got proper chai masala (the tiny cups of sweetened milk tea brewed with ground cardamom and other spices), nor did I take any auto rides. Autorickshaws are simply not permitted in South Bombay (the uber-snobby, wealthy area of Mumbai). I had some nice fresh juices (mango and pomegranate, and, no, I don't think that's what made me sick) and ate panni puri and other treats at Josh's favorite chat place. We also fake-shopped for more rugs and felt smug that Josh's rug guy gives us nicer rugs at good prices.

Mumbai on Too Many Rs Per Day

2008-06-19T10:30:00.002+01:00

I've spent most of my first three days in Mumbai in the 4-star wanna-be hotel by the airport. It was sort of like not being in India, except for the pods of obsequious staff in the hotel who tried so hard to make my experience exceptional and ended up annoying me. Nonetheless, it's been a good trip. My travel companions are upbeat, and we had several hours of productive meetings. I'm excited about the implementation, despite the fact that I couldn't get proper chai in the hotel.

I've since shifted to a smaller hotel in south Mumbai, the most expensive are in the city and possibly all of India. The staff here is trying hard but hits closer to the mark. My room isn't as schmancy (no hardwood incense burners to match the chairs ans a smaller flatscreen), but the hotel looks and feels cleaner. Unfortunately, this hotel is as pricey as a nice hotel in downtown Seattle but doesn't have the nice room.

You can take the girl out of India...

2008-06-12T06:25:00.002+01:00

...but she just turns around and goes back. That's right--call your aunties, I'm headed to Mumbai. Chai. Autos. Proper breakfasts! MORE CHAI!

However, instead of working for The People, I'm going on behalf of an Atlas client who has a customer in India. I'll be in meetings most of the week, and then a couple friends are coming from Bangalore and Kathmandu. I come back Sunday. It's a quick trip, but with this client, I'll be traveling to India at least a couple more times, and--if I'm lucky--I may get to visit totally new countries, too.

Growing Soft

I have to say--this new client is later-stage than our usual partners. I have an office, a desk phone, a laptop, and a global cell. They provide free snacks. I never have to wonder if the lights will turn on. In fact, my office has a sensor and lights up when I enter. It's this strange, lovely world where all the bills can be paid and you get whatever equipment you need.

Of course, it's still a start-up, and that means chaos, huge workloads and nutty people, so I still feel at home.

Woo! Thanks (and feel free to keep giving!) !!

2008-05-17T02:11:00.003+01:00

Carie exceeded her target, but don't let that discourage you if you still want to give. In fact, as Peter says, "Give until it feels good."

Everyone is awesome.

Help Carie reach her goal?

2008-05-15T07:34:00.003+01:00

Most of you know that my friend Carie has what we call "the cancer." She was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2004. Now, she's on her second bout at the ripe ol' age of 32 (but her 33rd birthday is this month!), and it seems to be not so much going away. In fact, it appears to be rudely persistent despite chemo and radiation and all sort of other activities that are hellish to endure.

Carie is walking in a Charity Thingy. She's going to walk five miles while having cancer and a post-chemo body. She's not met her donation target, so if you want to contribute, click this link. And I saw that lots of you (who have met Carie maybe once?) already donated (as well as having donated last year), so big thanks for being teh awesome.

!!!

2008-05-10T19:42:00.003+01:00

No sign of the hermit crab, but I think I saw the fish this morning! He hides out in the rocks, so maybe he wasn't killed. He's probably pretty pissed off, though.

Cross your fingers. I know it's only a few animals-you-can't-even-pet, but it's so depressing when they die from something preventable.

Normally, I wouldn't ask for a mulligan

2008-05-10T08:39:00.003+01:00

After a long-ish week of insomnia, low productivity, a busted Blackberry, snotty blog comments about Atlas, dismaying work emails and a sick favorite bee dog, I got inspired tonight when I found out that one of my saltwater fish I thought long dead was alive! I scrubbed parts and tanks, swapped out the light fixture on the saltwater tank, tidied up the surplus pumps, etc, and then made fresh saltwater. My fingernails still smell like algae, even after my shower.

After I poured the last bucket of seawater into the tank, I went to double-check the salinity and got shocked. I don't know how long electricity was running through the water, but I probably killed everything, including the little damsel fish I was so surprised and happy to see alive. At least it may explain why all three of my goldfish all died suddenly while I was in India (the light fixture was from their tank).

My life is overall really good (and seems especially so after reading the depressing stories about Myanmar), but can somebody turn off the firehouse of small, dismaying events that has been hitting this week?

"Who's hungry?"

2008-05-07T19:24:00.006+01:00

Yesterday, I had the chance to take a tour of a production facility for a potential client. Many seed-stage start-ups consist of a server rack and maybe a coffee maker, so it's fun to go to places that can make actual "things." Plus, how many of you went home and told your roommate/spouse/parent, "I toured a rendering facility"?

The facility was interesting. Mike and I got the full tour, and they thoughtfully provided us jackets to keep the smell off our clothes. I learned all about the meat and oil recycling process and how it goes from "wasted chicken at Costco" to biodiesel input and pet food. For those among you who don't know, I have a pretty keen sniffer (a by-product of an obsessively hygienic restaurateur mother). The tour was worth the stink, though because

1) Factories are cool!
2) Evaluating companies we may invest in means learning the technology.
3) It's funny to see your partner fighting nausea.

We stood next to barrels and barrels of fat trimmings, meat scraps, fish and chicken, all getting ready to be cooked up and broken down. The facility takes truckloads of meat-waste and renders it into usable product, and they only create about one trashcan of waste per week. We got to see the massive tanks of oils and the entire line that cooks and distills meat with a full narrative of how it breaks down. Red meat turn stringy and then brakes down into a high-protein, but the chicken fibers and hollow bones get ground into a sand-like substance that's less useful. Both end up smelling really, really weird, especially with the dampness and warmth of the air (they also take out, clean, and cool the water leftover in the scraps). Apparently, you have to keep the meat-meal dry, or all manner of cooties end up growing in it (E. coli, salmonella, weird mold). We saw the meat meal in a little room in great big piles, ready to shovel into containers headed for pet food facilities in the Philippines.
javascript:void(0)
Publish Post
I like the philosophical cleanliness, but it's going to be rough if I work on site. Also, I'd struggle not to constantly announce "Soylent Green..is...PEOPLE"

Clippy 2.0?

2008-05-05T22:35:00.002+01:00

Maybe I'm feeling a little cynical today, but isn't this Microsoft presentation landing page just Clippy in human form? Make sure you see "Finance Manager Martin." He's the Clippiest.

Ain't No Party Like a Princess Party

2008-05-01T07:16:00.003+01:00

Last night I attended a royalty-themed birthday party. The gala featured a truly fantastic female Prince impersonator, go-go dancers, a tribute to a cupcake with a Journey soundtrack, dancing adult Boy Scouts, live Jew's harp playing, Snow White dancing to REO Speedwagon, public spankings, and interpretive hula-hooping. I dressed as Princess Mia of Genobia from The Princess Diaries. The birthday girls had FANTASTIC dresses (sadly, I only stayed late enough to see three costume changes--I think more were coming).

The next round of fiestas will be for Cinco de Mayo is coming up. I may attend a party (though one had been canceled), but mainly I'm excited to see TOPH's tiny dog con sombrero! The only thing better than a theme party is dressing up a pet for a theme party. I wonder how long I could keep my cats in ponchos?

NYT fails us

2008-04-27T18:09:00.005+01:00

Though my typing is lousy, I do appreciate when people take time to spell-check and edit text before anyone reads it, especially if you're a major global media source. I'm disappointed to see the NYT failed to catch the misuse of the word "nonplused" in this article.

Up in Waterloo, where the towering winter snowpacks finally melted this month, R.I.M. executives appear nonplused. Though they would not reveal details, R.I.M. itself is expected to unveil a new 3G phone sometime in May and deliver it to wireless carriers throughout the year.

Nonplused means confused, utterly puzzled. What the author probably meant was "unfazed," unless I'm misreading the tone of the article. The word gets misused pretty frequently, but since they're, you know, The New York Times and all, I figure they should catch that sort of thing.

I sent in feedback email to the main desk and to the author, Brad Stone. He's been writing on technology for a number of years, including a mention of an Atlas client, so let hope I didn't piss him off by emailing him the definition.

Yep. We're related.

2008-04-25T07:29:00.006+01:00

Last week I returned to Tejas to hang out with my family and a couple friends. Texas is not as bad as you think it is. However, Plano is much, much worse. Nonetheless, I had a great time eating and observing my nigh-ridiculous niece run around. Also, I acquired this photograph from a fashion shoot The Niece did. If you know anything about my internet tastes, the photograph below will convince you The Niece and I are kin.

How many more times can the W Adminstration make us look dumb?

2008-04-22T07:21:00.003+01:00

Seriously?

I'd like to point out that I voted for Ann.

Everybody think good thoughts for Nepal

2008-04-10T07:04:00.003+01:00

Nepal had their elections (and the whole country's more or less shut down for the week because of them). They're what is known in political science as "a really big deal." Here's a nice NYT article, if you want to read some background.

That bold experiment will give this nation of 27 million an opportunity to cement peace and install a fully elected government, while most likely ending the monarchy that has ruled Nepal for 250 years.

Read The Himalayan Times to see what's happening daily.

Nepal has a pretty complex and troubled political history. The elections--or perhaps more accurately the power hungry--have brought out a lot of rough elements in Nepal. Transportation has been locked down, and they've had protests, bombings, and all around tense scene. However, turnout was high, and relative to what could have happened, voting day was fairly calm.

Nepal is one of the best places I have ever been, and I will definitely return some day. It made me appreciate living in a safe city and stable country--I'm counting my lucky stars and paying my taxes with a smile (now if we could just quit invading other countries...). So, when the dust settles in Kathmandu, go have yourself a great vacation.

My vacation may have been too good

2008-04-08T07:09:00.003+01:00

I seem to be lacking my normal persistence (read: anger) on the soccer field. I still feel pretty calm about everything, and I think I might run harder when I'm mad. Then again, I'm probably a lot dumber, so it's a draw.

In terms of progress, I've been back in Seattle two weeks and played six games. Since I only have one official team, I just accept any invite to sub. I gauge speed by whom I can outrun, in the following order:

5) Nobody (current status)
4) Overweight women in knee braces
3) Overweight men in knee braces
2) In-shape women
1) Men
0) (on a good day) Slowing down the really fast guys

I'm not really supposed to be fast--which is good because no one in my family is really built for land speed--but I did a credible job of getting in the way of the opposing team. I'm actually sort of surprised that I am not worse after so long being gone. In fact, one of my teammates said I was better than he remembered me being.

If I can just force my legs to go faster--I'm convinced that speed is a function of will--I'll be more useful on the field. I'm told not kicking the ball to the opposition will help, too.

DraftGuys - Feedback from anybody?

2008-04-06T19:49:00.003+01:00

A friend from college has produced a television show about football (the American kind). Since I compulsively promote small ventures (and because I occasionally pester him about some of my clients), I'll post the link here. I think I'll focus on this one to help me in soccer, though I don't really like Skittles that much...

Hmmm. "Diamond-like substances are a girl's best friend" might need some work...

2008-04-03T23:45:00.011+01:00

I'm billing again, my friends! In addition to a couple internal projects for Atlas, I'm working for Zolastar (The website getting hepped up some, don't worry). I'm pretty excited about them because:

1)They have wicked cool machines
The machines add a few angstroms of diamondy-coating to anything you put in them. That fact means you can make the merely shiny sparkle and/or make an item reeeealy hard to scratch.

2) I get to use what I learned in Earth Science
This fact means that 8th grade--conventionally known as The Worst Grade EVER--has finally paid off.

3) I like thwarting De Beers and their stupid ad campaigns in any way possible.
I don't like the diamond business for a lot of reasons, but I do love shiny things.

[Warning: Nerdy text below]

They create a diamond-like coating, which means you can use something else in the middle (like, say the much-less durable CZ) that doesn't have to be mined, but coat it in something that is diamond-like in hardness and depth. It's faster and less expensive to produce than other diamond simulants (look at me with my gemology vocabulary). So, you get all the bling without De Beers.

You can get all-the-way-through-diamond gems that are lab-made, but they are still pricey (I'm not just eco-crunchy and West Coast, I'm cheap, too). Zolastar gave me a sample pair of earrings, but I probably would have bought myself a pair anyway. Feel free to buy me the matching pendant.

Where Zolastar gets more interesting is non-jewelry items where you can take advantage of other diamond properties (like a low coefficient of friction and super-high scratch resistance) for industrial and commercial purposes--airplane parts, lenses, dog toys... I'm pretty entertained by the "What Can We Put in the Zolastar Machine" game, if anyone has suggestions (note: please nothing alive).

FAQ II: Back in Se-attle, again...

2008-04-03T19:15:00.022+01:00

Now that I am home, I'd better repeat the exercise of the first FAQ and the iFAQ. Feel free to ask more questions.

When did you get back?
How was the flight?
Feel good to be home?
Are you back for good?
Is your dad glad to have you back?
Did the cats recognize you?
How are the fish?
Have you recovered from jet lag?
How much do you weigh?
Are you working for Grameen Technology Center?
Do you have a job?
What have you been DOING?
What foods have you been getting that you missed?
How about Indian food tonight [snicker]?
Are you playing soccer?
What about those rugs?
Will you keep up the blog?

When did you get back?
Since Monday evening, March 24th. Mrs. Nelson and Mama (a.k.a. Amy-Also) fetched me from the airport.

How was the flight?
Fine. I flew from Kathmandu to Bangalore on Saturday, spent Sunday in BLR, and flew BLR-Heathrow-SEA on Monday. I read Lolita, slept, and watched movies. I sat next to some nice, very tall UW students who had been teaching and coaching in South Africa.

Feel good to be home?
Yes. I'm still finding wee ninjas that were hidden around my house, which was thoughtfully decorated in "God Bless America" style, plus at least nine teeny ninjas, gnomes, teeny horses, and a plate of Peter's Snickerdoodles.

Are you back for good?
I am, both in the sense that I will not go back to work in Bangalore, as well as opposing evil.

Is your dad glad to have you home?
You really can't tell with Dad, what with the furrowed eyebrows and somewhat stern demeanor. Chocolate chip cookies were in place, as expected. He's made these new butterscotch things that may have crack in them, near as I can tell.

Did the cats recognize you?
I don't know. They seemed uninterested in me when I arrived. Apparently they used to freak out when they heard my voice over Skype, but you wouldn't know it from my homecoming.

How are the fish?
The remaining fish seem fine. It was a hard winter, but a lot of my fish had been around for several years, so it may have just been their time. I am looking to get rid of a few aquaria, if you are interested.

Have you recovered from jet lag?
I get very sleepy midday, but I sleep through the night. I wish I could sleep less, though. I have too many nights that end up being >9 hours.

Are you working for Grameen Technology Center?
No, but I may volunteer or work on small projects, if AW needs me.

Do you have a job?
Yes, Atlas Accelerator welcomed me back with open arms. I have one project already, and I'm also working on internal projects. I'll probably have at least one more client soon, so if you want to hire me, call soon!

What are you DOING?
I spent the first week spending time with friends in a jet-lagged haze. If you saw me in the first two days, I was probably kind of stupid and might have tripped over something.

I've been meeting some Atlas clients and our new-since-I-left team. It involves a lot of food, so you know I'm into it. So far, I like all my new(-er) coworkers.

I also have a lot of logistical items like making the car start (needed a new battery), opening mail (thoughtfully and compulsively organized by Dad), starting taxes (hairy this year), cleaning up the fish tanks, and distributing India presents.

What foods have you been getting that you missed?
I ate a fair amount of Western food in Kathmandu (mainly bread!), so I was pretty well satisfied. I still need to go have some pho and a Ragin Cajun sandwich from The Other Coast Cafe in Ballard.

I had to ask Dad to stop baking for a bit while I get my eating habits back under control. I ate 3/4 of a batch of snickerdoodles and half a batch of chocolate chip in 2 days.

How about Indian food tonight [snicker]?
I never got tired of the food in India (except for mediocre Italian-like food) because if I was tired of South Indian, I ate North Indian, or Keralan, or Bengali...

Unfortunately, Seattle only has a few places I know of that serve South Indian, so Uncle Tarang and Auntie Chaithra had best dust off their sambar recipes.

Have you lost weight?
I have recovered most of the weight that I lost, so I'm only a little thinner than when I left. In fact, if anyone wants my dress I wore to the wedding in China, let me know.

I may have returned with another gastrointestinal companion, so stay tuned!

Are you playing soccer?
I've played three game so far. I'm playing the whole game and breathing as well as expected after 6-7 months in Asian cities (that's pollution you hear me coughing up), but I am s__l__o__w. I hope to be back up to my normal faster-than-she-looks-but-slower-than-most speed within a month.

What about those rugs?
OK--nobody asks about the rugs, but they are beautiful and I love showing them off.

Are you going to keep up the blog?
Well, I hadn't planned on it, but I suppose it is a useful thing, in that I don't have to repeat myself. Oh--wait. I ALWAYS repeat things. Well, we'll see what I end up doing. If nothing else, I'll blog about my clients.

"Washington my home, wherever I may roam..."

2008-03-25T07:09:00.001Z

(And in your head, you should be hearing the Sicko version of the song.)

I'm home.

Nepal continues to Teh Awesome

2008-03-18T02:19:00.003Z

As predicted, my posts are tardy.

Trekking Recap

I spent a couple more days in KTM planning my trek. I met another American who advised me that for a first trek in Nepal, Annapurna Circuit is the way to go. I hopped a bus to Pokhara, found a female guide, got my permits, and off we went. The trek took 13 days from Besisahar (a few hours' bus ride from POK) to Nayapul (another couple hours on a bus). The circuit has an AMZAING amount of variety. I'll spare you the day-by-day (you can read descriptions online), but I had a great time and returned filthy (some showers are hot on the trail, the bathrooms are too cold to shower, though), tired (some days I hike 30+ km), bruised (I got hit with a bucket helping at a fire in Manang), sick (some form of upper respiratory infection from which I am still recovering despite antibiotics), scratched (no idea how these happened), chapped (wind and sub-freezing AM temperatures), sore (looong stairway down the last day) and as happy as I have ever been.

It's probably time to return to work

I've been spending the remainder of my time playing super-tourist in KTM. I am a lousy tourist, though, and hope to meet with a Nepali Mifos Specialist today to talk about microfinance challenges in Nepal. However, I've seen a number of Hindu temples and Buddhist stupas, all of which have been interesting. Friday is Holi (which I may celebrate by playing, um, golf). I've been eating a little too well--ALL food in Nepal is great. Every last bit. Added bonus: I've been provided with a guest room (and washer!) at a friend's house, so I get to live outside the tourist ghetto, have unlimited hot showers, and play with a dog. The things I enjoy most are walking around the city (I tend to taxi out to a site and then walk home) and talking with Nepali people. They have a very intense political history, as well as important elections coming up in April. Despite all the tensions (and before my trek, fuel shortages) I was relatively unaffected as a tourist.

Nepal is FANTASTIC

2008-02-27T05:14:00.002Z

You must all visit this country. Just go start researching now.

I spent 3 days walking and riding elephants in Royal Chitwan national Park. I did not see any tigers, but I saw rhino, a bear, two types of deer, monkeys, a garial, and crocodiles. Birds are everywhere in Chitwan, and I will never get tired of standing in the forest and listening to them. I stayed an extra day and rode out with the elephant drivers to see them harvest tree tops for the elephants to eat (roughly two trees of twigs, per elephant per day, cut by hand with a machete, amounting to about two hours of hard labor on top of all the other work the guys do). I have pictures you can see when I return. I also played volleyball with the riders, elephants watching in teh background.

Today I am in Kathmandu finding a guide (hopefully female) and will probably go towards the mountains after tomorrow.

I'm in Nepal

2008-02-21T15:10:00.001Z

So far, I like Nepal a lot. I've only been here a few hours, but people are nice and the food is good. Even the salespeople don't pressure you! I'm staying in a tiny guest house on the edge of the tourist ghetto. It's not fancy, but it's cheap and I won't get bedbugs (but I have my sleepsack, just in case).

Kathmandu has fuel shortages right now (a road blockage by the Maoists), so it'll be interesting to see how I'm going to get around the country to see the sites. Tonight I saw people waiting in lines blocks long to get fuel.

You'll note that any post I may will likely be short and sloppy. The internet here is sloooow, and I am more interested in doing things to write about than tapping away at a keyboard.

I will miss many things about Bangalore, but...

2008-02-15T13:26:00.000Z

..not the small shocks I get from electronics. When I get home, I'll sit next to my grounded sockets and weep at their beauty.

I will miss most Grameen Koota and my friends, an unsavoury group of entrepreneurs, VC's, and eccentrics who have made my time here MUCH more fun than it otherwise would have been. One friend is confirmed to visit Seattle for a wedding in in August, so you can meet my Bangalorean platonic life partner. Another friend will be settling in LA, so if you are there, please look after her for me.

I will also miss
the chai lady
Panni Purri
South Meals
North Meals
Easy, cheap food delivery
riding in autos (yes, really)
Indian hospitality

I'm looking forward to my Nepal trip and being home, too, though. I am compiling my list of things to do. Oh, Costco--how I missed thee...

No news is bad news

2008-02-14T02:55:00.002Z

My laptop screen makes a quiet bzt and then smells of ozone. I'm hoping plugging a monitor into it will let me at least finish some work I need to do. On the bright side, Steve K brought me a SteriPen for my trip to Nepal so that I can avoid the types of illnesses I brought back from Assam. It was great to see a familiar face. Tonight I'm off to Hampi.

We had some unpleasantness with our landlady, but Liz may have worked it out. Hooray! I'm all but packed for home, and I've done a test pack for Nepal. It's a little heavier than I would like, but I'll be consuming or abandoning items along the way.

Souvenirs from Assam

2008-02-10T15:00:00.000Z

Though I shook my food poisoning in a day and was able to go running Friday, something has taken residence in my body. I'm running a low-grade fever and sweating profusely, among other less pleasant symptoms. I even had to skip an afternoon tea (and it was going to feature a lovely crab curry!). I've already started my antibiotics. Some friends came in from Seattle and have brought me a Steripen so that I don't go through the same thing in Nepal.

The trip to Assam was a nice change from the city, but the work aspects of it were less than satisfying, and I had a mildly creepy experience (you can ask me about it, but I'm not posting it here). I really enjoyed the jogging, though.

Pinwheeling is NOT the fun activity it sounds like

2008-02-07T14:29:00.000Z

I don't know what I ate or drank that put my body in full rejection mode, but I hope it's over with. I was awake last night a few times being violently ill, though everything I had today has stayed in. Unfortunately, I was too weak to jog this morning. Both meals I ate yesterday were in my hotel (it's close to the office and open during the bandh), so dinner tonight might be a PowerBar or some Spanish Tomato potato chips.

I've had a few good work days, though not in the areas I'd hoped. The bandh interfered with our connectivity testing (and my lunch), BSNL had an internet outage all day today (something about 100 metres of stolen cable), and I wasn't able to get as many decisive answers as I wanted.

Bandhs make things less interesting

We went to a dhaba (roadside outdoor-ish restaurant) for lunch. One of my associates ordered several dishes, only to find out later that we could only get daal, paneer, and roti because the bandh meant the market was closed. Restaurants don't carry big inventories. Instead, they send a boy to buy whatever you want (even if it's on the regular menu). Hence, no non-veg items and no vegetables. It was still good and I ate plenty, plus you can hardly complain about lunch for six for 390 Rs (about $10 US).

The roads and tons were pretty quiet. Crews were laying what I hope is cable (turns out the internet *is* a series of tubes...) bringing internet to the MFI branches. I saw a lot of people playing cricket (no school during bandhs, either), and guys squatting in a circle playing cards. Bandhs occur regularly here, so I suppose people have their routines.

Wrapping up

I and the Mifos Specialist Team head out tomorrow. I have another three-hour ride to Guwahati and six hours of flights (Guwahati-Kolkata-Hyderabad-Bangalore) to get home. I hope to relax a bit this weekend and maybe savor a few more Bangalore restaurants as part of my grand exit from India.

Ride Home from SeaTac: CHECK!

2008-02-06T18:45:00.000Z

Mrs. Nelson already offered to pick me up on March 24th. She might need an HOV buddy, though.

Only two weeks of work left, followed by the month in Nepal. My how times flies.

Bandh-ed

2008-02-06T09:49:00.000Z

One of the militant groups is having a bandh, so no field visit for me today. Tomorrow may be out, too. On the upside, the highway had even less traffic for my morning jog.

Return to Assam

2008-02-05T13:47:00.001Z

I'm back in Assam this week. Assam is part of the Northeast States and is a bit in the boonies, even for India. I flew into Guwahati and then rode 3 hours to Tezpur. When I was here in September, the rainy season was just ending and everything was bright green, muddy, or flooded. The rivers and tributaries were well outside the banks--even for monsoon season--and we saw a lot of tenement camps along the highway while people waited for the water to recede from their villages.

This trip things are browner and drier. The temperature in the day is in the upper 60's to 70's, and the dampness is all gone. It's nice to ride around the countryside in the fresh air, and at night I can see stars. People here are mellow, they're much more fit than elsewhere in India, and all the women have beautiful skin. I'll be here working (and eating well) with IIRM until Friday

When Roughing It isn't

The last time I was in Tezpur, we stayed in a hotel the travel guide described as "A tired, soulless place..." The food was good, but the description is apt. My suite (pronounced "suit") was large but mothbally and very worn. The staff was polite but also seemed somehow weighed down and vague (a byproduct of the rains?).

This time, I'm at the lovely KF Hotel Tezpur. It's brand new with Euro-ish dark wood cabinets, a flat screen TV, and a huge fluffy comforter (and I'm not even in a deluxe room!). It has a cute little departmental store with cheap Chinese imports (Barbie Uno, anyone?) and lots of snacks. The only downside is that they serve crappy machine-made Nestea instead of brewing Assamese tea properly, and my sambar was tepid. Free breakfast or not, I may have to venture elsewhere tomorrow. I mean--seriously--how can you screw up tea or sambar in INDIA?

Just because Tezpur translates to 'blood city' is no cause to worry

I JOGGED OUTSIDE TODAY! I was able to go running for forty glorious minutes before work this morning, along the highway (size: American 2-lane) through town. It's not too dusty here compared to Bangalore, and the only motor vehicles at that hours are a few trucks, buses, and Army caravans. I jogged pass the guys with AK's, the bicycle rickshaws, and the kids waiting for school in relative safety, especially since every morning from 3-7 AM, the army sweeps the area with dogs to guards against roadside explosive devices [insert soft "whump" as Mom passes out reading that phrase].

Assam experiences frequent signs of political instability--strikes, riots, and the occasional bombing. However, I'm a) near a city (5km), and b) right down the road from the Commandant's house, so I'm pretty safe. The army "sanitizes" the highway for at least 5KM on either side of his house--perfect for a short run!

It's so much nicer when the most common vehicle is a bicycle. I got stared at a bit, but I was less of a draw than some guy net fishing. In fact, I got far more weird looks when I went running in Greece and Turkey (though I don't run in a cowboy hat here).

Schedule Recap

2008-02-02T16:25:00.000Z

I have less than a month left in India. This week, I fly to Assam for 5 days to check in on a deployment. I'll be in Bangalore working until February 20th, with a short side trip to Hampi.

Nepal!
On the 21st, I fly to Nepal. I don't have a planned tour, so I'll spend a few days finding a group to trek with or hire a guide (probably female), as trekking alone is ill-advised. I'll spend 2-3 weeks hiking from tea house to tea house, and then take some time in the Kathmandu Valley site-seeing. I hope to go south to Royal Chitwan National Park, too. I return to Bangalore March 22 to say good-bye to my friends here.

Thank you, India

I arrive in Seattle on March 24th. I'll probably spend the next week recovering from jet lag, attending a couple meetings at GTC, and doing important things like turning my phones back on, finding soccer teams for spring season, and eating as much of Dad's cookie dough as possible. I plan to begin work with an as-yet unnamed Atlas client around April 1st.

Franchisetopia

2008-01-25T11:08:00.000Z

Bangalore is growing and people here are making money. When you have more disposable income than your parents, what do you buy? Donuts and ice cream!

Bangalore has The Donut Baker* shops popping up all over. They look like Dunkin' Donuts but in yellow and brown instead of pink. The donuts are fine (buy the raised donuts--the cake donuts are dried out) and not too different from what you would get in the US or Canada. The shops are bright and clean and usually adjacent to another Global Franchise Architects store like Pizza Corner or The Cream and Fudge Factory.

So it's just like home?

The biggest difference you notice is that The Donut Baker--or any American-looking, shiny franchise shop--has a VERY NERVOUS staff who try desperately to fit into the corporate plan. Smile now. SMILE.

When I went to The Cream and Fudge Factory, as I read the menu board, I was offered a laminated plain-text copy of the same menu, handed a glossy printed flier, and received suggestions from the staff about what cone I should have. Instead of the order-scoop-pay process, I had a hovering young woman waiting to take my order. I tried to get one of the fancy cones with chocolate ice cream instead of vanilla, but I was told by the hovering girl and the scooper it wasn't possible (turns out the ice cream was banana and it would remove a critical component from my Cream and Fudge Factory Experience).

After taking my order, the hoverer wrote it down on a carbon copy pad and then told the ice cream scooper/topping mixer the order and told me the price. I started to pay her but realized I needed to pay at the cash register. The girl at the cash register looks at me blankly until the hoverer repeats my order and the price (at no point were any of the written items passed on directly). I pay my 99 Rs and received a register-printed receipt. They tell me I can sit upstairs (in The Donut Baker), too. Meanwhile the scooper and two other employees go off to the side to debate the size of the brownie slice that was to be mixed in my ice cream. I wait 5-7 minutes in the ice cream parlor and then my waffle cone is proudly served in a cone holder with The Cream and Fudge Factory plastic spoons and napkins.

How many people does it take to serve a donut?

After ice cream (which was ok), we went upstairs and bought some donuts. The donut line is semi-self-serve. Someone hands you a tray and some tongs and you pick the donuts off the racks (check out the image gallery) and then you slide down to the cashier who will take your money or hand off your donuts for parcel (what we call "to go" here in India). Employees seem confused, nervous, AND VERY VERY EAGER. It's quite the vibe, since The Donut Baker had FIVE employees to eagerly serve donuts. Not mixing or baking--JUST BEING EAGER. We sat down for five minutes while they placed four donuts in a box and the box in a bag. While we waited, a sixth The Donut Baker employee walked in (and number seven was mopping the stairs outside).

The by-product of all the employees, the boredom, and the nervousness is that people may stare at you to make sure you are having The Appropriate Global Franchise Experience.

* On the site, I'm not sure which phrase is funnier "innovative high quality donuts" or "proprietary dough."

Want to help Microfinance?

2008-01-24T05:55:00.000Z

You people know I am not above tapping my friends to help (and thanks again to Ashlock for doing work for Grameen Koota!). Mifos 1.1 will be released in a couple months, and we could really use some extra testers (or devs or admins or tech writers). More eyes on a product are always better, and anything you can do to give the core team more time to work on other areas means more bugs get fixed and features are better, and that translates into fewer headaches and lower costs for the microfinance institutions. It's not as fun as building houses or working directly with people, but you can make a big difference in the back office. The the ability to manage large amounts of data is what allows for the scale of microfinance to increase. Also, cost savings mean that over time they can afford to have lower interest rates for the borrowers. The better Mifos is, the fewer patches and less time it will take to deploy, lowering overall IT costs.

Let me know if you are interested, and I'll find you an assignment. For those of you curious about 1.1, check out the Product Road Map or the Test Server.

One Month Left

2008-01-22T02:58:00.000Z

Time flies when you're arguing with auto drivers. I finish my contract with GTC on February 20th, and my trip to Nepal will be Feb 21-March 22. I fly to the states 2 days later. If you want me to bring you something from India, you should let me know now.

General Update

My life is pretty ho-hum. With the exception of this weekend, I'm still working quite a bit. I've acquired a cold, but whatever was in my GI tract seems to have been permanently evicted. China/Singapore put some weight back on me, so you can no longer count my ribs on sight. I've undertaken some loose planning for Nepal, but essentially I'm booking a plane ticket and will figure out guides, etc when I get there. Mainly, I sit at the laptop, have conference calls, and spend any free time socializing with more local people by tagging along with a friend. I've taken to staying in the city more (availing myself of guest rooms and couches) and subsequently quelling the gossip, as spending extra time with/overnighting at any male friend(s) raises a lot of eyebrows in the wee social circles of Bangalore (both local and foreign). I've nothing spicy to report, other than some unwelcome invitations from someone I exchanged no more than 10 words with, none of which was social in nature. The pigeons left us one of their own--Liz arrived home the other day to find a dead bird on her patio.

I'll spend the last month wrapping up tasks and transitioning my work to AW, who will manage things from Seattle until my full-time replacement is hired.

The Dallas of Asia

2008-01-11T05:48:00.000Z

After Beijing, we (that is me and my buddy Josh) spent a couple days in Singapore. We stayed at some friends' who have a lovely flat near Orchard Road, Singapore's main shopping district. Singapore is a large, tropical, spotlessly clean city-state devoted to commerce. It's filled with huge malls and department stores, and--more importantly--ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT FOOD COURTS.

Mmmmmmm..Doooonuts...
I replaced half the weight I lost in India on the Beijing/Singapore trip. Eating and shopping are the national pastimes in Singapore. We ate at the outdoor hawker market, inside the malls, at the house, and in the airport--donuts, chicken rice, brownies, cranberry bread, Dairy Queen (Peanut Buster Parfaits are not as good here), Burger King (our host had a craving and sent the maid out to get it while we drank), custard puff, cheese, hummus, soba noodles and juices.

Around meals, we managed to see some beautiful orchids (30 or 40 varieties) at the Botanic Gardens and did some shopping. The orchids were definitely the most enjoyable non-food activity, since I don't like shopping, especially in Asia.

"Um excuse me--do you have this in extra, extra, EXTRA large?"

Every major European, Japanese, and American fashion outlet is represented in Singapore, and the prices are about what you would pay in the US. Sadly, in addition to being an XL in India, I am positively enormous in Singapore and Beijing. The only clothing I came close to buying was a man's wool coat at the Shangri-La Beijing. To get shoes before the wedding, I had to go to three shoe stores before finding one that had had any in a size 8 (one female clerk actually got bug-eyed and laughed).

It seems my brawny, muscular frame is too much for high fashion. I sometimes couldn't even get sleeves over my arms, and if I did find the next size up, it was too baggy around the middle. Besides the sizing issue, most of the clothes available are items one wears to do more shopping, not something I would wear to work (too short, too low-cut, too gold-glittered). I pray fashion in the US has not gone to stupid as it has in Asia..

I did get some treats for myself and friends at Muji and purchased a knock-off iPod Shuffle for $20 since my actual Shuffle is dying a slow death (and no way can I work out without music here with the squeaka-squeaka of the exercise equipment). I paid $15 too much--the device is possibly the flimsiest piece of electronics I've ever had.

Relaxing
We spent the evening at the house talking, eating, and enjoying the lovely tropical night. Day two we spent buying more food and making a half-hearted attempt to camera shop before heading to the airport and returning to dusty, chaotic Bangalore.

Beijing

2008-01-10T03:29:00.001Z

Beijing was impressive--clean, modern, and LARGE. I thought it would feel different and exotic, but it reminded me of home because of the 10-lane highways, cleanliness, and omnipresent sense of organization relative to India. In fact, Beijing appears to be 50-60 years ahead of Indian cities, and it's hard not to wonder if they'll ever catch up.

The buildings are ENORMOUS--Las Vegas hotels are small in comparison. The pollution is bad, though we had blue skies at least one day. Food is fantastic, though laden with far more meat and oil than I eat (either in India or the US). I ate plates and plates and bowls and bowls of food, including TWO meals at one of Beijing's famous duck restaurants, a 12-course wedding banquet, noodles, dumplings, hot pot, snacks, and juices. As an unexpected bonus, I spent the time with a great group of people in town for the wedding--an elaborate and over-the-top event. To top it off, we stayed at the Shangri La hotel where I took shamefully long hot showers, ate perfect apples, and slept as soundly as I have in years.

In case you were unaware...

Not much of old China is left in Beijing, as it's been heavily modernized AND IS PREPARING FOR THE OLYMPICS. REPEAT: THE 2008 SUMMER OLYMPICS ARE IN BEIJING. YOU MAY COMMENCE PURCHASING SOUVENIR COLLECTIBLES. BEIJING = 2008 SUMMER OLYMPICS, AND WE ARE CLEAN, PROSPEROUS AND PREPARED FOR THE 2008 BEIJING SUMMER OLYMPICS. CHAIRMAN MAO AND THE PANDAS WANT YOU TO HAVE A GOOD, CLEAN 2008 SUMMER OLYMPICS.

Beijing has Olympics all over it--tons of souvenir shops, street merchandise, a mammoth stadium, public service announcements, giant signs at The Great Wall of China, and office buildings with 40-ft flashing Olympic mascots dancing across them. Educational videos on each sport play in the very clean Beijing subways next to rows and rows of newly-installed ticket machines and booths. Spitting is out, friendly is in, and let's all give the world a big Beijing welcome...

Power Tourism

We visited every tourist site Beijing has to offer: The Great Wall of China, Tiannaman Square, The Forbidden City, The Summer Palace, The Lama Temple, The Temple of Earth, The Temple of Heaven, a government pearl shop, The Ming Tombs, the Beijing Zoo, beautiful parks, touristy art shops and some of the largest malls in Asia. I was freezing most of the time, having only a light jacket and layers of warm-weather shirts. Fortunately, the massive amounts of food warmed me up quickly.

We saw most sites with wedding friends, save for one day with a tour guide. Normally, paid individual tours are a great way to see the city, but unfortunately our tour guide stuck to the approved script. The temples are beautiful, mammoth and IMPOSING. China--old or new--has mastered monolithic architecture. You really need only 4-5 days in Beijing to get all the sites, although it sounds like we should have spent more time in the museums in the Forbidden City. The gardens we saw were lovely, even in winter and must be gorgeous in spring, summer, and autumn.

Our most culturally relevant experience in Beijing was lunch at KFC. The Chinese are crazy for the Colonel. It was good and clean, though certainly no where as good as Chik-Fil-A (unavailable in China, India, or Seattle).

Do Not Ever Visit the Beijing Zoo

Normally, I do not visit zoos outside the US and Canada, but Josh wanted to see some pandas (I saw them in San Diego) and we had a few hours to kill before our flight. I assumed it would be a pretty good zoo, given the global popularity of the panda. The new, modern, clean China broke down at the Beijing Zoo. Once you leave the pandas, the conditions are horrible. Cracked and broken glass, mice tunning through the exhibits, bare cages with bald bulbs, and large animals trapped in 6x12 cement enclosures smelling of urine. The exhibits--even for tropical animals--were poorly heated (Beijing was below freezing nearly the whole time we were there). It's one of the saddest and worst places I have visited, and I hope the Chinese government realizes what an appalling image it's going to give Olympic visitors and fixes the issue. It's definitely a strong reminder that most of China is not at all modern or prosperous, and you wonder who paid the price for all the Olympic polish.

Travelin'

2008-01-01T12:37:00.001Z

I'm off to China tomorrow night, followed by a couple days in Singapore. China should be fun, cold, and smoggy. Singapore will be clean and full of good food. If I'm lucky, I'll be able to buy a new camera and a new MP3 player on the trip, since my Shuffle appers to be dying and my camera sucks.

After I get back, I'll return to Assam for a bit to check in on the deployment in person. I hope to squeeze in a trip to Cambodia for a weekend to see Angkor Wat in January, and I will go to Hampi (though maybe not by train) before I leave for the US.

My tentative plans for February are to finish work on the 20th and fly to Kathmandu, Nepal via Delhi a few days later. I'll spend a few days getting acclimated to the altitude and then fly to Pokhara to start my trek on the Annapurna Circuit. I'll be out on the trail for a few weeks and then back to Bangalore for a few days before flying home on March 24th. I might throw in a side trip to Bhutan. Really, though, I am likely to change my mind and switch to Laos or Japan or somewhere else--we'll just have to see.

Made in India

2007-12-31T09:20:00.000Z

One of the sadder phrases you see on goods here is "Export Quality," as though having a sturdy, well-crafted product is something not meant for India. If you want high-quality goods like we get in the states, you generally end up paying as much or more than in the US.

Before I came back to India, I thought getting clothes here would be relatively easy--I got a great pair of pants here last time. In other posts, I've discussed how I was too big and the wrong complexion for ready-made clothes. Also, Western clothes tend to be of poor quality and/or expensive (for example I bought a great pair of jeans for $30 US).

Please Shoot Me.

Although I found a simple dress a few days before Christmas, I hesitated to buy it because it had a bad zipper, and when I went back Christmas night, it had sold. I shopped around for a while for dresses and shoes and found nothing except more bad zippers. My friend H agreed to take me shopping the next day since I didn't have much time.

I spent about six hours riding and walking around Bangalore, trying on poorly made, over-priced, wrongly-proportioned garments, one of which I got stuck in and had to have help escaping. In another shop, an alarmed shop keeper blurted "No--it is too small!" when H handed a cute dress to me. Even 15 pounds lighter, I'm still too big for Bangalore.

NONE of the ready-made Western dresses looked great, and all of them were $100-$1000 USD, most I wouldn't pay $30 for at Ross. Shoes were a complete loss. I'm
waiting until I get to China, rather than spending $30-50 USD on ill-fitting, REALLY poorly made plastic crap in styles that are either terrible or ill-suited to the freezing weather in Beijing. I would have paid a couple hundred dollars for a pair of good closed-toe heels--shoes are something I try to buy infrequently and of high quality--but you can't find them here.

Why to buy ready-made clothes

I ended hiring a tailor to make a dress. It seems like having clothes custom-made should be kind of fun and end up fitting perfectly, in addition to being less expensive than ready-made items. Unfortunately, the tailor doesn't come to you, you have to know what you want, and you have to make a lot of trips. I had to make three trips to the tailor, plus a side trip to get the fabric.

H made the process as easy as she could--she knew the tailors and where they were, asked the right questions, etc. Her tailor wasn't available, so we went to Commercial Street to try two others. The nicer, more expensive tailor was too booked for New Year's, so we had to go to the second choice, a mother and daughter whom H doesn't like much (with good reason) but who had time before I left for China.

The first trip was while we were already on Commercial Street. I told her what I wanted, got specs for acceptable fabric type (plain silk only), get initial measurements taken, run out and buy fabric and bring it back, have detailed measurements taken, and then run out to get the liner fabric and bring it back because she didn't mention liners in the first place. All of that took about 90 minutes (plenty of fabric stores on Commercial Street, fortunately). The fabric cost about $15-20, and the stitching cost about $30. I spent another $10 on auto rides.

The daughter called me back Friday to have a fitting, where I had them raise the midriff band and take in the bodice a small amount. I tried to be friendly but efficient, pointing out that raising the band would deemphasize the width of my ribcage. She ignored me, had me get out of the dress, and I moved on. That second trip only took 20 minutes plus an hour's worth of to and fro. The mother called me the next day to say the dress was ready. I returned a third time to pick up the dress, which took TWO HOURS, not including the 90 minutes to get there and back.

"I am not an animal!"
Many of you may not realize that I have a large ribcage (that's not a euphemism). It happens to be less tapered than a normal ribcage. Though the tailor took measurements of my ribcage at many points, when I tried on the finished dress, I had to have someone else zip it and couldn't breath. I gave it back to the shop owner's mother, and she snapped at the tailor to retake my measurements and let the seams out. I sat down in the shop and worked for a while.

When the dress came back, I tried it on and it fit fine around the ribcage, but the fall in the back looked goofy. I sent the dress back for adjustment and sat down to work again. Durign this time, I overheard the shop owner's mother talk to her staff and to customers. She was sweet as honey to the customers (until the topic of money came up), and as rude and disdainful of her staff as she could be. At one point, she tossed an empty bag at a woman on the floor who was hand-sewing beads onto a top. The owner's mother could have set the bag aside, or even tossed it next to her, but she seemed to make a little extra effort to put the bag in the way of the woman doing the beading. I'm not sure if I've ever seen anybody so deliberately express the concept of someone's "station."

Third Time's The Charm?
The a different tailor came back with the dress. The fall in the fall in the back was fixed, but the zipper split when I put it on, and the sides looked asymmetric . The mother, looking annoyed at this point, sent the tailor into the nearest work room to fix the dress. He then carefully pressed the dress to fix the lop-sided appearance. The mother put the dress into a plastic bag to indicate that no more adjustments would be made. I took the dress out of the bag and tried it again.

The dress fit well enough that I took it, since I wanted to get home and/or to GK and the mother wasn't going to be able to do much more with it. The dress it mediocre--I probably should have used the brocade pattern for an accent band only. Tiny stitch holes are in the silk, and it still doesn't fit me that well. I'll have to have the seams let out when I get home, since it seems unlikely that I'll stay this thin. After seeing how they treated the staff, even if the dress had been perfect, I don't think I would go back. Instead, I'll go to H's preferred tailor and have shirts and pants made at reasonable prices, and I'll be able to give them shirts I already own as a pattern.

H made me matching brass jewelry that is much better than the dress. It'll only stay bright for a few weeks, but it's very cute and well-matched!

I did not shoot my eye out

2007-12-26T16:21:00.001Z

I had a great Christmas! Two stockings, many pancakes, and a viewing of A Christmas Story. I got to make a Lego monkey and eat Pepperidge Farm cookies. We ate lovely pan-seared fish for dinner, and then we went to a rooftop party with a bonfire (uh--what fire code?). Also, I found out today that my visa went though, so I'll be off to Beijing next week.

Santa was here!

2007-12-25T03:11:00.000Z

I had a Christmas stocking waiting for me this morning!

Merry Christmas from Bangalore!

2007-12-24T17:52:00.000Z

Yes, Virginia, Santa Claus is in India, as are Christmas trees, ornaments, and Christmas carols. To be fair, the Christmas carol ringtones and reverse tones (when cars back up, they sometimes play music) happen year-round, but I've noticed an upsurge.

Many of the shops--be they owned by Hindus, Muslims, or Christians--have been decorated, and I have gotten Christmas texts and emails from people at both deployments. It's not quite the same as being at home, but I love that India celebrates almost ANY holiday. The Hanuka showing was a bit weak, but 6000 out of 1.1 billion is tough to play out, though I did have a belated celebration involving latkes on Eid, so that should count for something.

I'll probably work from home tomorrow, and I hear rumors of traditional Jewish Christmas paella being prepared.

If You Like "Can't Coach Fat, You'll LOVE..."

2007-12-22T05:00:00.000Z

You may be surprised to learn that the internet has many, many blogs. In fact, my original idea was to not write any individual posts, but instead just reference another foreigner-in-India blog. My experiences are not actually that unique--just google "ex-pat blog India" to see the same stories told by different people.

Snakes on a Bike

I only read a couple blogs, on of which is Ride South by my insane friend Dave who is cycling to Tierra del Fuego. He has a fantastic Q&A with some elementary school kids. For the record, I have only seen one snake in India at the park. It was in the water, and I don't know if it was poisonous.

Punkassblog is the other blog I read from time to time. It's maintained by a friend of mine from college, but it has multiple contributors covering feminism, politics, and sometimes material sciences. Kyso, whom I've never met, would probably get a marriage proposal from me, were it not for the fact that she's a lady.

Now if only Bangalore had web access at coffee shops...

The internet is pretty much third after air and water in terms of importance for me. About 70% of my work is done online for or using Mifos.org, Skype or IM, our internal wiki pages, and email. The internets keep me somewhat connected to home, since I can read The New York Times or Seattle papers online. Interesting fact I learned this morning: you can pay to get an article put in an Indian newspaper (and frequently must pay).

I have a few people at home who check in on me and send me pictures of animals in ridiculous outfits. I'm able to talk on Skype (you can even call me at a Seattle number and it'll ring through to Skype and my cell phone), and a few people check up on me daily on IM (and send me drunken SMS's from time to time). If I could get some of Pete's Carmelitas (a.k.a. BEST FREAKING COOKIES EVER and undoubtedly how I will restore my missing pounds), it'd be just like home.

I Am Legend

2007-12-20T14:58:00.000Z

So, now that my silly 16-hour days are over, all the NRI's, NIR's, and I's I know have gone to the US, Turkey, Goa, or other locales. I couldn't pull a last minute trip together for this week ("Sorry, madam. No flights anywhere for South East Asia"). However, I am the Queen of Opportunistic Travel, so I managed to tag along on a wedding trip to China in January instead of traveling this week. Cross your fingers that my visa goes through.

Lesson Learned: Say TOURIST

I tried to go to Hampi yesterday, since I had to cancel the trip last weekend because of work. Unfortunately, I put my Bangalore address on the ticket application. Then, when asked what kind of visa I had, I said business and pulled out my passport (idiot move). As it turns out, the Indian railways only reserve seats for foreigners who are tourists or students. Those of us with B on ours visas have to sit on the waiting list with the Indians or book tickets months in advance.

"But I'm a foreigner."
"It must be tourist visa."
"But what about this part here--that says tourist visa."
"NO. It says here 'B' for 'Business.' Tourist says T; Student says S. Yours says 'B.'"
"But I'm a foreigner?"
"No."
"But it says tourist visa?"
"No."

I was 53 on the waiting list. I did not get the overnight train. I probably will have to go back and lie to get a seat, as the trains are booked out for months (to quote a friend "You're screwed. You're never getting to Hampi by train.") Alternately, I'll just take an overnight bus or hire a driver instead.

Replace Me!

2007-12-17T08:15:00.001Z

It looks like someone may be hired to replace me here in India (and possibly to overlap with me), so if you want to do what I do, you should email me. You might even get to work in other countries, too!

It's Schedule H for "Healthy"

2007-12-16T16:57:00.000Z

I got more and more fatigued through the week, in part because I was working too much and not sleeping enough. The other problem was I hadn't yet shaken whatever I picked up the week prior (which I believed had cleared out). Any time I ate, my stomach hurt, and I couldn't finish my food. If I didn't eat, my stomach also hurt. It was getting more difficult to rally, to the point where I had to lie down all the time just because I felt tired and full. I couldn't even finish sushi Friday night.

I always wanted to be a doctor...

Before work on Saturday, I researched my symptoms online(result: likely a parasite, probably Giardia or some other protist), found the names of the drugs (Tinidazole or Metroindazole), and cross-referenced the information on several sites (CDC, etc.) to make sure the drugs were commonly used (they are) and not overly toxic (OK, but alcohol will cause projectile vomiting). I felt comfortable to skip the long trip to the doctor (generally with my symptoms, they treat you before they test, and I didn't have enough oomph to get myself across town). After dragging my lethargic self to GK and working a few hours, I stopped at a pharmacy on the way home, gave them the drug names, and for about 55 cents US had myself a cure.

The blister pack clearly says some rubbish about "Schedule H substance: Only issue with script from licensed physician," but since I had taken the trouble to write the names in my notebook to show the nice young men at the pharmacy, that's the same as several years of advanced study, right?

I spent a while at home rereading the dosage recommendations and looking up the warnings and advisories. In India, when you get a prescription, you get the blister pack and nothing else--no box, no instructions, no "take with food," and no dosage. Fortunately, all that information is available on the internet from the drugs companies and several doctorsl resource sites. I also skimmed the paper on the most effective treatment methods. Take aways: One-time, 2 gram dose, taken with food. Drink plenty of water and no alcohol. I emailed Sean that I was taking drugs, just in case I ended up having an allergic reaction or something, but the warnings, side-effects and advisories were along the same lines as other anti-cootie meds I have taken (tough on the GI tract, might cause hives, possible tingling or numbness in the extremities). Also, it's one of the drugs travel docs prescribe to bring as a just-in-case-something-nests-in-your-gut item.

Back in Business

It's tough to say if the medicine made me more tired or if I took it just in time. I spent most of my weekend lying in bed or on the couch working. However, Sunday I was able to consume food and not feel like my bloated belly was going to go all Ridley Scott. The only side effect seems to have been a metallic taste in my mouth all day (which persists today).

I can't imagine what it's like to get parasites all the time and not be able to get the drugs to fix them. Some things you can build up an immunity to, but for the most part, the taps here have critters in them that people who don't have fancy water filters like I do are going to get at least a few times a year, and most of them can't afford to go to the doctor and can't afford not to work. One of the things you see on some MFI loan applications is "water source" (mainly for data gathering purposes), and water education practices are critical in a lot of areas, along with oral re-hydration therapy techniques (boil water, mix in some sugar and salt--presto! You have Gatorade for a sick baby).

Now, back to work wit renewed vigor and fewer internal companions...

Why Don't You Blog More?

2007-12-12T18:49:00.000Z

I try to edit the entires a bit before posting, and I usually write them when I am stuck without something to do (loss of internet, long car trip, stuck with a few wasted minutes waiting for someone to join a meeting). Lately, I've had good connectivity and not much to say.

To give a general update, I have been working quite a bit. When I'm not working, I get away from the laptop. Also, my life is pretty ho-hum, cricket chachas notwithstanding--I either work all day at home and break for a quick meal, power nap, or workout, or I get up, work, go to GK to work, come home, work/workout. Sometimes I work at different locations (fancy hotels, BabaJob), but for another couple weeks, I'll be putting in the time (and let's hope I'm doing some good). At at that point, I might go on a short trip somewhere else in Asia.

I do make a point of going out a few days or nights--LONG brunch on Sunday, cricket Saturday, drinks/dinner Saturday, Wednesday, and Thursday nights--and put the work around the activities.

I've been having sleep issues again as well as some illness, so I'm pretty tired. So, yeah--I am as boring in India as I am at home. :)

Foreigner Fame

2007-12-09T18:07:00.000Z

Saturday: Cricket!
Clever LT got us hooked up with tickets to the India/Pakistan test match. Here's me with Pakistan's Chacha Cricket. If you were watching, you would have seen us on TV with him, too.

I'll try to post something else about what the actual match was like.

Hubris

2007-12-09T14:05:00.000Z

After publishing that I hadn't had any stomach trauma, I consumed something disagreeable or just picked up a 24-hour virus. I seem to be fine (though tired)and didn't resort to antibiotics.

"Water, water everywhere..."

2007-12-05T08:29:00.000Z

At most lunch places, you eat with your hands. To be hygienic and polite, one always washes ones hands, even if it's just one of the stand-up places. You will find a signs for HAND WASH and DRINKING WATER. HAND WASH is usually a small sink and a tub of liquid soap. DRINKING WATER is filtered and/or UV treated water. The faucet has cups next to it from which everyone can drink and then return the cup, but no one touches a mouth to the cup.

Strangely, spoons tend to get wiped and placed into a bin of water when plates are cleared. You then draw the same spoons out of the water (my fantasy is that they are washed and then put in the water to keep flies off).

[Jan '08: Turns out my hopes are true! they are washed properly and then stuck in the water, probably for that very reason.]

I drink filtered water instead of bottled water at restaurants and home. Almost everywhere filters tap water before serving, so the risk is pretty low. After a time, you get a sense of where you should and should not drink water. Also because I am not traveling (and can go be sick and miserable at home), I have abandoned "peel it, boil it, or forget it," though most Indian veggies are peeled AND boiled. I am more conservative outside of Bangalore, though.

Cooties
To date, I've had no major gastrointestinal trauma, other than eating too much rich food or getting dehydrated. Malaria medication (no longer taken), Western food and red wine are the most likely things to give me stomach aches.

What gets you are coughs, sore throats and sniffles. Everywhere people are coughing and hacking from disease or pollution. `And, when you are poor and work as a cook, you don't get sick days, so people are likely sick and working in kitchens. These days I feel fine but have a persistent pollution cough. Our cleaning lady seems to always be coughing and sniffling, and I think I have caught her cold at least once. Luckily, no severe fevers or anything worse than mild fatigue so far, though I'm pretty sure this post about guarantees I end up with dengue or something.

Bless My Taxes

2007-12-02T18:04:00.000Z

Many people assume cities in India are dirty, confusing places with dogs and cattle roaming the street. This impression is--with the exception of a few areas--entirely correct. In a few days, you get used to the dirt and realize that a lot of it results from unpaved roads, a dry climate, and a bit of wind that turns everything dusty. The trash is a problem in many parts of the city because Indian cities lack regular public garbage collection, so you end up with trash piles like the one shown [Note: to be added later]. Periodically, a truck will come by and pick up the garbage and take it somewhere. Other times, people will just burn the garbage because they can't do much else.

Bangalore is not bad everywhere, and you get used to it anyway. The scent of human urine is more prevalent in downtown Seattle than in most of Bangalore. You just move past the smelly things like garbage piles, piss walls, and business men wearing too much cologne.

Piss Walls?
In India, men can pee in public all they like. A lot of times, some walls receive more urine than others. Some corners in the cities have waste-high outdoor stalls by the side of the road where a gentleman may piss and have it go directly into the gutter. A photo from outside the Muslim cemetery near GK:
"

Women do not pee in public if they can help it, though small children squat most anywhere. I can always find an at-least-as-clean-as-a-comparable-North-American bathroom, whether they have Western commodes or porcelains squat toilets (the latter being preferable to hovering). TP? Bring your own or go local (You can Google Indian bathrooms for tips and techniques).

And from the Worst Idea EVER files

2007-11-29T05:50:00.000Z

Having an acoustic guitar "just to play" in a Barista coffee shop. As if the cafe-going young men of the world need encouragement to appear soulful and sensitive. What happened to chess sets?

Thank god most people don't play Indigo Girls songs here . Unfortunately, someone did pick up the thing and start strumming, and it didn't even cover up the "All Love Songs, All the Time" music playing in the background.

On the upside, I got Indian ketchup with my panini.

Doh!

2007-11-28T05:00:00.000Z

No water.
No phone.
No internet.
I'm just waiting for my laptop to explode and my books to catch on fire.

Picture Pages

2007-11-27T10:19:00.000Z

If you want to see more photos than are posted here, you can email me. I'm not a huge fan of publicly search-able photos, nor are some of my friends, so I'm not using an open link.

Sadly, my camera battery is nearly dead, so I'm going to have to figure out what to do before I start really traveling (Nepal, Bhutan, and Bangladesh are likely to be my post-work travel locales).

I will never buy a cheap camera again. I intended it to be somewhat crappy at $120, but it actually is too lousy to even get a decent shot off with any consistency, the battery never lasted long enough, and it doesn't have image stabilization (though Buy.com indicated it did). Moreover, I have severe SLR envy.

Uh--You guys know I'm not exactly roughing it, right?

2007-11-26T18:42:00.000Z

After a few Thanksgiving phone calls, I gather some people think I am "enduring" Bangalore well. While I'm sure I could milk that idea for care packages, I am obligated to make it clear that my life in India is at least as easy as my life in Seattle.

The Wrong Impression: "I work 6-7 days a week. I must go through five auto drivers before I find one who will take me to the client site. Everything takes longer here. The pollution is so bad I can't run outside. I haven't found any soccer teams, and the treadmills squeak. My laundry just returned a shirt with the same toothpaste stain on it. I can't travel alone after midnight..."

Just Send My Tiara
I do very little laundry or cooking. I sleep in a king-sized bed. My apartment has three huge bedrooms, two bathrooms, and marble floors that we have someone else clean. I live in a walled compound that includes a parking garage, a swimming pool, basketball courts, and a mini skate park. I have air conditioning, but I've never used it because the weather's been so great.

I never have to drive. If I am out too late, my friends have a driver take me home,
let me sleep over, or ride to my house with me. While riding in autos, I work or read books--I've gotten more reading done here than I have in months. Sometimes I get to ride on scooters and motorcycles and get through the city quickly. I can hire a driver if I ever needed one.

Work is whenever, wherever, and as much as I like. I can work from home most days, and my commute is opposite the traffic. The IT Director at GK is spectacular and patient with me. The client site has a huge jackfruit tree growing in the courtyard. Every time I go in or out of Grameen Koota, children shout "America! America!" and want me to smile and wave at them.

"Damn, it feels good to be a Gangsta"
Meeting other people is easy. I go out three to five times a week. People buy me drinks and dinners all the time, and I got spoiled on my birthday. Wednesday night we played poker, ate chicken, and drank beer while shooting pellet guns and listening to NWA. I had two Thanksgiving dinners.

Almost all of the 20+ restaurants within walking distance of my house deliver. I eat South Indian, North Indian, Indian Chinese, Thai, Chinese Chinese, Malaysian, pizza, Italian, and steak. I also know where to get sushi and Belgian beers any time I need them. Sushi is the only meal that costs more than $20 USD, and usually I spend <$1 USD per meal. I am tired of Italian food only.

I can talk to my family and friends by IM or Skype when I miss them. TM thoughtfully hauled twenty pounds of shoes and cranberries to Bangalore for me, all of which was packed by RB and my dad. Friends at home make time to talk when I miss them. Ashlock even volunteered to do a small project for GK.

All this AND Diwali?
I received an hour-long pedicure for $9 USD. I see fireworks at least once a week. I get special treatment because I am foreign far more often than I am hassled for it. Auto drivers and clerks ask me where I am from and tell me about their relatives in the United States. Service is different than the US but far better than Seattle.

So, yes, we have power outages weekly (that's why I brought an extra laptop battery), and I'm on water rations for four days (I have additional places to shower and extra bottles in the fridge), and my new sport is professionally annoying auto drivers, but adjusting was easy. As long as you are patient enough, India always takes care of you.

Amy: 2 Mosquitoes: 10

2007-11-20T19:51:00.000Z

We have a lovely apartment, but it appears to be mosquito-permeable. My suspicion is that they come out through the drains. We keep the windows closed starting late afternoon, and we have wee mosquito-toxic Plug-ins. The apartment complex gases the shrubbery and building lobbies every night at 6 PM. However, when you live somewhere that never gets colder than 60 degrees that has open sewers, there's no getting away from them.

I killed two at my desk tonight, but not before getting TEN BITES on my right leg. Thank god for After Bite. I can't imagine what it's like living someplace where the mosquitoes (or malaria) are even more of a problem, like Mumbai or Minnesota.

Like Jaws but More Annoying

The itchiness fades pretty quickly (especially if I don't scratch and apply After Bite), but sleeping in a room with a mosquito is awful. The tiny thing makes a shrill noise loud enough to keep me from falling asleep, mainly because I know I am about to get bitten on whatever flesh is exposed (usually only hands, ears and face). And--in an unfortunate event of literary appropriateness--another one just landed on my back as I was typing this entry. Other than my general lack of talent for falling asleep, mosquitoes are my top source of insomnia.

More press, this time for Clover

2007-11-18T14:40:00.000Z

My brushes with fame continue, as one of my favorite gadgets (and an Atlas client), the Clover coffee machine, gets press in The Economist.

On the topic of coffee...
India has two big chains, Barista and Coffee Day. They are both Starbucks quality (over-roasted beans, really sweet drinks), but they do a better job of serving things at the right temperature, albeit MUCH more slowly than at home.

The food they serve, however, is far superior to food at a chain coffee place in the US because 1) Again--the temperature is always right, and 2) if you get a sandwich, it comes with delicious Indian ketchup (similar to American ketchup but made with real sugar, a touch of chili, and possibly crack). In my northwest coffee snob way, I roll my eyes at foreigners who miss Starbucks.

Michael, please have my Stumptown ready upon my return.

Language Updation

2007-11-13T14:31:00.000Z

A mere two months in India, and my vocabulary is already changing. I swear much less, mainly. My name is now pronounced something more like "Eh-mee." I participate in things at "timings" of the day.

A friend has gotten me into the habit of calling my auto drivers, security guards, and any male service person "Boss" (pronounced more like "bose", with a long o and an s) As in: "Hai,Boss--where's Lavelle Road?" Note that you pronounce the name of the street "Lavelly," and, no, not like the Japanese "hai." Also, if I am talking to an auto driver, "road" gets half an "l," like "rload." To give turning directions, I'll say "rligh-teh," "lef-teh," and "strai-teh."

At work: updation and upgradation. These words are perfectly acceptable in Indian English, but they still make me flinch.

I now "take" meals ("Madame, you will take breakfast?"). If I eat a lunch, I order South Indian meals, though I'm only getting one. I also tell waiters that "filter water" is okay for me to drink. Instead of bell pepper, I eat capsicum, and I generally have curd (yoghurt) with every meal.

We don't know why, but adding "only" to the end of a sentence seems to make ideas more clear, like "I am here only." I'm experimenting with adding adverbs to the end of sentences in general.

I use the Indian head bob (just Google it--a million ex-pats whine about it) to indicate yes and maybe. I have no idea if I use it correctly, but I haven't had any problems yet.

I can get away with anything by saying "No problem!" and giving a huge smile. I'm pretty sure it only works because I am wealthy/female/foreign.

NYT Article on Mifos

2007-11-13T08:52:00.000Z

The latest New York Times article on Mifos, complete with a photo of George looking as nerdy as possible.

More Diwali and Birthday in Bangalore

2007-11-12T17:58:00.000Z

I took Saturday off and had a mellow day. Tarang, who is from Bangalore but now lives in Seattle--took me out for lunch and coffee as well as delivered my precious cranberries and Pepperidge Farm stuffing. Let's all give a little love to Tarang, Rodger, and Dad for being a good logistics team. I have a full supply of Emergen-C, my hiking boots, much needed files, and another credit card. Also important, I got small kitten stickers to be surreptitiously placed on friends' phones.

After a Biriyani lunch, I wandered around and finally found a shop selling shower curtain rods, so now Max can be spared damp TP. It was a big triumph--I've been asking every time I pass a home or plumbing store without luck (and hopefully they will have another one for Jimmy when I go back).

Unfortunately, I failed to find new a shirt. Even though now I am small enough to wear 10% of the shirts available, a lot of the colors look TERRIBLE on me (though they are great on local complexions, so I can't really fault the stores).

Mmmmm
Several of us went to 3 Storys (yes, spelled that way) and had really good coastal Indian food. I'm a huge fan of Indian coconut curries. Liz got me presents, someone bought me dinner, and now that I think about it, I haven't bought my own alcohol in forever. We chilled at a a nice roof car until last call, and then we went to a party at a friend's place. All in all, a good day.

Happy Diwali!

2007-11-08T10:41:00.000Z

Diwali has started here. I know this because I hear firecrackers going off about every five minutes. From what I have been told so far, to properly celebrate Diwali, one should:

Eat sweets
Buy gold
Set off ENORMOUS QUANTITIES OF FIREWORKS

Any holiday with fireworks is good by me.

Only One Thing Really Sucks Here

2007-11-07T05:15:00.000Z

That was then
After my other trip to India, laundry was the one thing I was certain would go well for me. Maybe I was grubby from travel and my standards were lower, but I remember my clothes coming back clean, crisp, and on the same day.

This is now
We have tried three laundries. None of them manage to have clothes ready for us on the date stated on any consistent basis. We could get them to deliver instead of walking several blocks to check, but then you have to be here to answer the door.

Sometimes, my clothes smell less clean--though different--than when I dropped them off. Whites and brights are lost causes (the socks in the photo are from when I first arrived). If I want something white, I bleach it at home. Anything I don't want stretched or stained, I wash in a bucket in the shower and dry on the balcony.

The ironing is good, except when clothes come back with iron marks. The irons they use are generally pre-Depression Era devices that involve coals. We see women with large, flat carts pressing clothes on the street. IEverything comes back ironed--even sheets and towels.

All articles when finally returned--the record is three weeks and four visits to get back two pairs of socks--have tiny, hand-written tags matching the receipt. The wee tags are probably important because our clothes get dropped off at the cleaners, someone picks them up, and then they are taken somewhere to be washed in some body of water. We see women and children standing in the gutters washing clothing, though I have not seen any of mine there yet. I like to think my laundry is higher-end and maybe I get tap water instead of gutter water.

Washing clothes in the bucket gives you an appreciation for 1) North American water systems (yes, even Houston), and 2) the spin cycle. The water is cloudy from the tap and sometimes smells weird. I hand wash with Tide, and it dries out my hands. Wringing out a bucket of clothes is tedious and boring.

Dear May Tag Man, Are you single?
We could buy a washer for a couple hundred bucks, but I'd still be faced with wringing, and my clothes would still have to line-dry. All those "Spring-Fresh-I'm-A -Housewife-and-Happy-in-the-Sun" ads are crap. Line-dried clothes smell like mildew, pollution, or weird tap water, depending upon the weather, and they are crispy.

Dry cleaning is an inexpensive solution, but I'm not sure I can bring myself to dry clean all my clothes, in that even with US EPA standards, dry cleaning shops become Super Fund sites. I can't imagine India has any regulations (or any that are heeded), so I'll only use it for my white dress shirt.

On the bright side (sort of), my father tells me that my washer is limping, so when I come home, I may get to buy some sexy, new front-loader. Rrrrrowwwlll!

My Favorite Timings of the Day

2007-11-07T04:10:00.001Z

(The power is out, so why not blog?)

Chai is one of my favorite things about working in India. If I go to the office, a nice lady or an office boy comes around at 11 and brings me a tiny cup with scalding, sweet chai. They come back and quietly pick up the cup. The same thing happens some time during the 3 o'clock hour, too.

If Liz and I go to a meeting, we almost always get a wee cup of chai AND some cookies.

I love India.

The chai in India is MUCH better than the chai you get at home. The tea is much stronger, and it's sweetened with sugar and not syrup (or whatever they sweeten chai with these days).

I'm considering opening chats and chai in Seattle. I just have to learn how to make purri.

Sweet!

2007-11-04T17:48:00.000Z

I get English Premier League soccer on normal TV!

Having a Lovely Weekend--starting Wednesday

2007-11-03T19:08:00.000Z

The weekend in Bangalore is a touch different, since many firms have business hours on Saturday and/or the over-achiever types I party with work Saturday anyway. Nonetheless, I always have nice weekends.

Good-bye, Nelson!
Thursday was Karnataka Day, so many of my friends had the day off. Hence, Wednesday several people met up at the 13th Floor for a send off of Nelson, who has to leave Bangalore after only 3 months to return to Dallas. He shall be missed.

I left when the shots came out, since I was working Thursday (and it was getting too late to take an auto).

Happy Karnataka Day
I celebrated Karnataka day by working away from the house and going to a department store (a very Bangalorean thing to do, apparently--it was PACKED). Coffee shops have nice sandwiches and power outlets for my laptop, plus I had a FANTASTIC veg panini. In India, all the food gets server at the proper temperature and crispness (not to mention Indian ketchup)! On the downside, I heard a lot of bad international dance hits from the last 10 years (think "Barbie Girl."). I also bought a shirt (since some ketchup ended up on mine) , wandered around Brigade Road, and hung out at a more different coffee shop.

...it's what's for dinner
Thursday night, some of the Bangalore Professionals (the Indian/ex-pat social group to which I belong) met up at a steak house. It was clean and kitschy and about as accurate of decor as you would find a Seattle restaurant posing as Texan. My steak--although not actually the filet mignon cut it was billed--was quite tasty. Since most other people were tired form the night before and I had a 12:30 AM conference call with Seattle, it was another early night.

TGIF (even if we do have to work Saturdays)
I spent Friday at GK having a VERY productive day. Any day that is productive--even when it starts with the auto driver making me walk the last kilometer to work--is a great day. All Bangalore fun aside, it's the work that is the most important thing to me.

Friday night I had a lovely Caribbean dinner at a restaurant in Indiranagar, and then went to a housewarming of a friend of a friend. Another early-but-tipsy night--home before midnight.

Some work and Some More Italian Food

Saturday I worked, tried to get my laundry, succeeded in getting everything but the pair of socks I tried to get the last time I picked up the laundry, and somehow managed to nap, too. I spent the evening at a shi-shi Italian/Western restaurant hosting an exhibition of a modern artist, and it was a lovely time. I met some Indians and more foreigners, had eminently drinkable Indian white wine and a tolerable Cab (that tasted nothing like a Cab), somehow managed to get a free dinner (thanks, Phil!) and a ride home from a friend's driver.

Just another Sunday
I feel a need to complete the weekend tale, though Sunday was spent around the house doing my end of month accounting and following up on work issues. I think I spoke maybe two sentences all day (hello and thank you to the maid) until I made a few evening phone calls. The solitude starts to make me a little weird, so I had better make an effort to interact more when working from home.

Paper plates, anyone?

2007-11-03T19:06:00.000Z

Here's another look-I'm-in-India post: the disposable plates you can get on the street. I took this photo of the plate vendor at the KR City Market.

The plates are made from banana leaf. No bleaching, no printing--just leaves dried into the appropriate shape. It's not exactly the most hygienic approach, but here you learn to get over that. Another serving method is to use a flat, green banana leaf and serve food on it like a plate when you have South Indian meals (mmmm).

Here's a photo from close to the same stall where they're separating the banana components:

Also, to answer a previously asked question, "What is the weirdest thing you have smelled in India?" I would have to say it was the bulk banana sales stalls a few blocks away in the KR City market. Thousands of banana stalks, some of which are presumably rotting 1) does not smell like bananas the fruit at all, and 2) was a powerful enough smell to make me hurry to the next block, and I smell rotting garbage/sewage/animal matter daily.

Want to Help?

2007-11-03T12:19:00.000Z

We are going to release version 1.1 soon, and we can use some more testing of the product. You should let me know if you want to help test.

And let's all praise Ashlock for her PhotoShop Phun on Phriday to help me get some logos together!

Other than this--it's pretty much the same

2007-11-03T05:43:00.000Z

Things I Do in India that I Don't Do in Seattle
- Jaywalk
- Eat breakfast every day (a habit developed when I had to take malaria prophylaxis)
- SMS (Daily, hourly, by the minute...)
- Blog
- Drink more than once a month, in cars, before noon...
- Go dancing
- Shop to kill time
- Avoid eye contact
- Go to concerts
- Drink chai at least twice per day.
- Use a treadmill.
- Use a treadmill while breathing Malathion.

Things I Did in Seattle that I Don't Do in India
- Wear seat belts
- Operate vehicles
- Play sports
- Go out alone after 11:30
- Eat sushi (Bangalore has a couple places, but I haven't been to either)
- Shower for more than 6 minutes (the geyser only lasts so long)
- Pet random dogs (You can get mange here)
- Gain weight

Here's what a Center Meeting looks like

2007-10-30T12:04:00.001Z

Liz snapped this photo when we were in Assam last month. I seeing what happens in the field, but it's really disruptive to have foreigners at the meetings. We are kind of weird, and the rumors start that we are giving the MFI more money, so sometimes the women expect more or larger loans.

When I go to branch offices to observe business processes, I try to make it clear to the staff that they shouldn't be nervous, as I work for them and am not like a regular foundation employee (who might be checking them out to give additional investment). Here's a shot of teh outside of an IIRM branch with IIRM staff and some of my GTC peeps. It's kind of a pity I didn't get the goat in the shot, just for effect:

And finally, a picture from near an urban center in Bangalore. It's probably the best picture I have taken (which isn't saying much, as my camera is crap and my photography is almost as bad). Kids love foreigners and having their pictures taken:

Every time I walk to GK when the school kids are out, they start laughing and say "HELLO!" and maybe run up to shake my hand and then laugh like it's the funniest thing ever and run back to their friends. I get a huge kick out of it every time.

Busy Week

2007-10-28T17:33:00.000Z

I spent a lot of time with GK this week. Tuesday I was at GK, and Tuesday night I had ~4 hours of meetings with Seattle. Liz arranged a meeting Wednesday at another MFI where some friends work, and we got some great information on their software (we aren't pushing Mifos on them, just seeing what they like/dislike about it), as well as getting a chance to share ideas on some common projects. Thursday I was back at GK and had two hours of meetings that night, and Friday we were in the field until 10 PM, observing poorly connected branches and how Mifos performs at them. The trip information we got was well worth the long rides, plus Liz and I watched some of Casablanca on the way back into Bangalore.

Saturday I spent the day running errands, chasing down my ATM and PIN from FedEx (long, indignant story, but I got what I needed. India always comes through for you), shopping for costumes, and working in between. The ex-pats celebrated Halloween at a couple parties (including one co-hosted by Liz at another friend's house), and I was up until the wee hours. Today I had a mellow day hanging out with friends, having a nice big lunch, and getting Learn Kannada in a Month. I think it's going to take more than a month, in that the book's vowel pronunciation guides contradict one another.

I'll be getting busier and busier, as GK's current Mifos implementation team (IBM) is leaving, so I'll fill in while we look for another Mifos Specialist firm. Also, I'll start engaging in the Assam deployment, and every day AW, Liz or I think of more wiki, templates, and docs that need to be written. And--of course--I have my busy social calendar. Six months is flying by.

Who knew the blog title would be so apt?

2007-10-25T08:09:00.000+01:00

I'm down to my last belt hole. I'm likely <140 and heading down below 130 in another month or so. I haven't had any digestive issues, I eat three or four meals a day, and I am still getting thinner. This process happens to a lot of people. The running theories:

1. Indian food is all made from scratch, so fewer preservatives and hormones in my food (not sure I buy this one)
2. Less high fructose corn syrup. Everything here is sweetened with cane sugar.
3. Fewer hydrogenated oils.
4. More exercise from walking (Nope--I walk less and bike not at all).
5. Vegetarian diet = low fat? No. Most of the food I eat is LOADED with ghee and/or other oils.

Upon my return, I won't be in the same shape as when I played three games a week, but at least I wont have much extra weight to carry around. You can't coach fat, people.

"Funny--you don't look like an Amy"

2007-10-23T15:06:00.001+01:00

Someone tried to use at least one of my credit cards at Suganda Sagar Enterprises for about $17 USD. I think it's the hardware store near my house.

So, if I present my ID to you and am an Indian man, it's probably not me.

Chikmagalur

2007-10-22T16:37:00.000+01:00

Having had productive Friday (Oct 18th), I decided at the last minute to join The Bangalore Professionals on last weekend's outing out to a coffee estate in Chikmagalur

Saddle Up
Liz and I left for the group rendezvous at 9:30 PM Friday night. After sitting in rainy, nasty traffic for 90 minutes, we got to the bar for "Let's party before we leave." I drank a post-traffic bourbon and chatted with new acquaintance Erik, who has lived all over India.

Some cops showed up around 11:40 banging sticks and shooing most non-foreigners out of the bar (giving the police need something to do while waiting for bribes), and I met a man named Aziz who offered me advice on keeping my husband.
Eventually all cars and travelers showed up, and we started 5 hours of bumpy, rainy driving/half-sleeping. I'm very glad our driver was good.

It's Noon Somewhere in the World
Around 6:30 AM (after several stops for directions), we ended up at Chikmagalur Golf Club. I passed up both playing in the six-some as well as the vodka I was offered (For the record, I didn't start drinking until after breakfast). The countryside was pretty and you could hear all sorts of bird calls. Some of us found an empty couches to nap on for an hour or so while waiting for the golfers.

We lounged on the clubhouse veranda until 11 or 12 (drinking coffee, having some shots, listening to music that probably irritated the golfers on the first tee box), two jeeps showed up and we took a bouncy ride up into the mountains to the plantation. Beautiful ride, sunny weather, great lunch upon arrival, and then the rain started. We were more or less housebound (I read and napped, some played a drinking game). When the rain stopped, a couple of us went tromping around the creek, looking at coffee shrubs and frogs. Let's go with some pictures, courtesy of Liz:

The jeep waiting at the clubhouse

Scenic ride up the hills:

I feel totally like a legit traveler...
...because I bear tiny, proud scabs from leeches. The leeches were very small and easy to pull off, though I couldn't figure out how they kept grabbing my shoes and socks (I wasn't in any water). Here's one of Liz's leeches:

By evening everything cleared up, we had a nice barbecue (mmmm--coal-roasted tiny bananas stuffed with chocolate and coconut!) and more drinking. I listened to stories of ex-pat debauchery (thanks--I'll stick to just drunkenness) and was exhausted by 11 PM.

Coffee & Vishnu

Sunday was definitely the best day. Those of us left behind from the first jeep load got the tour (and more leeches) from Joseph, whose family owns the plantation. It's about 150 acres with a creek running through it. Seeing how small scale agriculture works was interesting. The mountains are all green and misty, and it's so, so nice to be away from honking Bangalore.

Of course, we had a delicious breakfast with lots of chai before another jouncy, scenic ride.

We ended up taking 9 hours to get back to Bangalore for a number of reasons, but the best one was a very cool Vishnu temple in Belur that all sorts of extraordinarily detailed carving inside and out. We had a good guide who was easy to understand, and the tourist scene is pretty mellow (we were the only foreigners I noticed there).

All in all, a long, near-sleepless but fun weekend.

I Am Officially Stupid

2007-10-22T15:49:00.000+01:00

I seem to have lost my wallet. It likely fell out of my pocket. I went through the step-retracing, the department store has my phone number, etc. I even got a soundtrack--"Stupid Girl" started playing in the store. Kindly refrain from the obvious posts about me and wallets.

However, for $30, my credit union is sending me a new debit card. I'd like to take back anything bad I have ever said about my credit union, as they have come through like champs on the international front, whereas Wells Fargo was so incompetent I closed my business account, and Chase Visa just seems confused.

I still have my passport. I can also get $40 in traveler's checks back. I had to cancel three cards, and I'll probably have to re-do my bill pay on a few accounts. I lost about 2000 Rs in cash, but I have my home stash to tide me through the weekend (losing all the small bills is rough, though). The real loss would have been my DL picture where I am wearing a tiara, but they digitize pictures now, so I'll still have it when I get home.

D-E-C-A-D-E-N-C-E

2007-10-22T09:05:00.000+01:00

RUI
Our normal Tuesday night meeting with Seattle was canceled, so instead we saw the Black Eyed Peas. The band was to go on at 8, so we started out evening about 5:30 by meeting up with a friend, and then more friends, and then off across the traffic of Bangalore to get to the show. Total transit time was 2-3 hours, and that's without having to worry about parking.

Instead of our usual auto rickshaw ride inhaling dust and diesel with horns and bad mufflers everywhere, we passed the time in quiet, air conditioned comfort watching "Weeds" on DVD, drinking skunked Kingfisher, and lounging in air conditioning while Mr. Srinivas, the driver, handled traffic. Being drunk and watching TV in a small car is definitely weird and the best way to manage evening traffic in Bangalore.

Let's Get It Started
We lost our friends initially because I had to make a mad rush to the ladies' toilet, having had too much Kingfisher and too little of a bladder. [Note: concert port-a-potties are the same in India as the US, if not a little cleaner]. The concert was pretty good, though it was so packed up front that Liz and I chose to move out of the crowd to be able to dance more. Eventually, we were able to find them and enough space to dance. We could have gotten closer, but Fergie's outfits scared me too much.

After the concert, we partied at Pebble, met some more ex-pats, and generally made merry. It's kind of crappy that last call in Bangalore 11:30, but it mainly forces everything to start earlier. You get to party like it's the weekend but get in bed on time to be rested for work the next day. Genius!

"I have chickens in my ceiling."

2007-10-12T11:48:00.000+01:00

The Saga Continues
Friday, 7 AM - Wake up from nap hearing the clickety sounds of pigeons on ceiling tiles.
8 AM - Call maintenance. I think I woke someone up. He hangs up on me.
10 AM - Call again. Attempt to make bird noises to express problem. Man on phone agrees to send someone.
11:10 AM - Call again. In the third cycle of the ring-back tone, an AirTel recording tells me nobody's home.
12:00 PM - Call again. Answer! I try English slowly and emphatically to someone who doesn't understand me. "OK, OK, m'am. "
12:35 Give up and go drop off laundry and get lunch.
2:48 - If at first you don't succeed...
2:49 - "The AirTel you have called is--busy. Please try your call later."
3:31 - Dialing...Answer! I use the phrase "like chicken. in ceiling." when asked what the problem is "OK, Madame. I will come." I say "bring ladder."
3:38 - The sweet sound of the doorbell!

The maintenance man shows up with a set of Allen wrenches and a screwdriver. I show him the problem. He laughs a little and tells me the word for pigeon is "belu" [Auntie Chai--do I have the correct word?]. I explain (in a sad, sad, I-am-American-and-could-not-find-Pimsleur-Kannada-CD's way) that the window is never open, the pigeons may be gone, but I heard them this morning, and maintenance guy #2 already caught them and put them out.

Maintenance guy #3 removes a couple of tiles--one of which has a ring of crap (literally) that was likely a nest at some point--and sees GREAT BIG GAPS around the pipe that Liz no doubt saw and I missed earlier this week, as did the other maintenance man. In fact, I think the other maintenance guy saw it and didn't want to deal with it.

He plugged the hole with some extra plastic bags we had here. No ladder. No mortar. He even refused my duct tape. He just climbed into the ceiling, bracing one foot on the bathroom window sill and another on a towel rack. I handed him the bags while he balanced. When he was done, he climbed down, scraped the shit off the ceiling tiles, swept up, and left.

Oh--and I Have a Job, Too

2007-10-12T02:41:00.000+01:00

I'll take a break from "Wacky India" posts and write about the job, since work is why I came to India (though having found the sizes and quality I want at the department store next to the compound, I am starting to enjoy shopping).

About MFI's
Wikipedia has some good, short summaries on microfinance, microcredit, and the organizations involved. One of the things I like about the work is that many of the NGO's in microfinance work collaboratively, though the MFI market itself is getting very competitive in India. I have met with people from other organizations (Unitus, ACCION) who were both helpful and honest about the strengths and limitations with Mifos and microfinance.

Branches
Last week, Liz and I went out to an urban branch and took notes on data entry using Mifos. I find this type of activity interesting and humanizing because you get to see the pain points the product causes.

An MFI branch differs from what you may think of as a bank branch (no Muzak, thankfully). The branches can be in Bangalore near slums or 100 km outside the city. GK currently has 44 branches serving 120,000 active clients and will grow rapidly in the coming year.

A branch has one PC for data entry and a few tables at which loan officers process cash reconciliation. Branches do not have air conditioning, and the power supply is on a backup generator because power are frequent. The internet connection may go as high as 512 KBPS (you are probably reading this on at least 700), but generally it's going to be much lower, and outages necessitate the use of dial-up connections. Some branches consistently operate at ~56 KBPS.

Loan officers interact with their clients at center meetings. The meetings take place somewhere (indoors or outdoors) close to where clients live. LO's typically travel by motorcycles to get to all locations.

At GK, LO's go out into the field in the morning to hold center meetings and collect payments. They have 20 clients per center and meet with six or seven centers every day, Monday through Saturday. After the meetings are complete, the LO's work at the branch reconciling cash and accounts. When that portion is complete, one loan officer starts data entry into Mifos. Later in the day, clients may come in to receive an special disbursement.

[I'll add pictures when I get them from Liz, who is a much better photographer with a substantially better camera.]

After all disbursements and paper work are complete, data entry finishes. In the evenings--the times when the poor are not working--the LO's will work on recruiting and training clients.

Yes, but what do YOU do?
Part of my job here is to work with GK to help answer questions and get accurate information on how Mifos gets used and what improvements we can make (or what improvements we can punt to the next release). Also, I post updates to Mifos.org, test defects, and create other documentation. I am likely to have a hand in some other deployments in India, as well as help execute a workshop for MFI's and Mifos specialists in January.

The other role I play is to vet potential Mifos Specialists and development teams located in Bangalore. Mifos Specialists are the people who help MFI's implement Mifos (Mifos is free and open source). Liz (whose focuses on business development) finds potential firms, and we interview them jointly (for now). Though we've met some good development prospects, we have not yet found a good implementation firm that is appropriate for both initial deployments as well as longer-term possibilities. However, we're getting better at screening as well as making better connections.

Even though I change jobs frequently (eight companies since college, not counting a few one-off contracts), it is tough being 12.5 hours away from the rest of your team (though they make efforts to be available for us, especially AW, who is checking and responding to email while on her Aegean vacation). I end up googling a lot, faking a little, and getting good ideas for the next things to document.

It's easy to work a lot of hours because 1) Theres a lot to get done, and 2) I still have to figure out a lot of things, 3) Seattle is online when I get home from Kingfishing so I work into the wee hours, and 4) My insomnia is back. Also, I never feel like I get enough tasks completed, since I only have through February to contribute.

But, Bangalore has a lot of places to eat and drink, so I go out a few nights a week. I work out at least every other day, and when I start feeling burned out, I go check out something in the city or work on my post-India travel plans.

Questions?

I Can Tell I Have Adjusted...

2007-10-12T01:01:00.000+01:00

...because I can't sleep.

NASA publishes lots of studies on jet lag. They think it takes about two days per timezone moved to adjust to the changes. India is 12.5 hours off PST, and I started having trouble sleeping a couple weeks ago, taking me back to my normals rounds of insomnia.

It's a Small World

2007-10-10T19:35:00.001+01:00

The start-ups--I am drawn to them. This one is pretty damned cool (and relevant to my current work, even!).

Tonight I had Mediterranean/Italian dinner with Sean of babajob and babalife. Sean was e-ntroduced to me by the fabulous Gio. As it turns out, Sean's Microsoft crowd overlaps with mine (weirdly, the evening started with "Oh--do you know Peter Ford?" with whom I've only had sushi and generally have no other reason to know other than he's a likable guy); he had a former Casa del Fuego resident as a TA; and he may even have met my current roommate.

Strangely, he doesn't know Nelson, and you know he'd remember the Prettiest Man in Seattle.

Bert Hath Cursed Me! **

2007-10-10T06:13:00.001+01:00

My roommate has birds in her ceiling [NOT A EUPHEMISM].

After trying to get maintenance a few times--including our landlady trying, though she never used the word "khachara" only "pigeon-eh." I think adding an extra vowel sound is how you Kannadize an English word--I have the right person here.

I know he is the right person because he CAUGHT TWO PIGEONS WITH HIS BARE HANDS and shoved them out the bathroom window. This method seems far more effective than my planned technique of poking at them with a broom until they magically vanished.

The problem may *appear* to be solved. However:

1) We know the pigeons didn't get in through the window because she doesn't open it and we know they go in and out,

2) I can hear baby birds cheep-cheeping every morning, and I did not see him take out a nest.

The maintenance man assured me "no children" and that the birds got in through the window. This fact concerns me even more, since it implies that I hallucinate baby bird noises and pigeons are able to open windows.

I'm pretty certain this post will end up being a series.

**This incident and the squirrel in my attic in Seattle were all brought upon myself for making fun of Bert's raccoon invasion two years ago. Bert, I promise to buy you and Kim a really nice wedding gift if you have the curse lifted.

Oktoberfest! (brought to you by The Good Times)

2007-10-07T18:56:00.001+01:00

We saw Oktoberfest advertised on a billboard and went to check it out Saturday night (though Sunday is a bigger drinking night, it wasn't a good night for us). The 'fest was fairly far north and took us a while to get there (compounded by traffic and stops at two gas stations. We don't know why the first gas station was rejected, but our auto driver was NOT happy with the attendant).

Oktoberfest itself was similar to music/outdoor festivals at home, but it was on a smaller scale. You had to buy tickets to get beer, they had hippie jewelry and t-shirts for sale, and we ate fried food. The only thing missing: no funnel cake, elephant ears, or local fried sweets. The beer variety was amazing: you could have Kingfisher draught, Kingfisher in 350 mL cans, or Kingfisher in 500 mL tallboy cans-- and if you had enough people--you could get the Kingfisher mini-keg for 750 Rs.

The battle of the bands was at times good, though the band had clear favorites (i.e. the James Brown was atrocious, but the Oasis cover was much tighter:

Miss D, I'm pretty sure your skills are in high demand here). Liz and I walked around, drank Kingfisher, introduced ourselves to a few white people--including a nice young man from Stuttgart--and saw a lot of really drunk, really stoned, and really enthused Indian men dance around. Some were nice and were friendly-chatting; some were kinda creepy. It was your standard music fest experience, except that a man I would officially call an old dude wanted to buy me a drink.

Here we are enjoying The Good Times (except that I don't like Kingfisher):

We danced some, too. I found that a nice elbow-rave was enough to keep people at a distance. Our fun had to end early for practical reasons. Drunk, usually-repressed young men start getting unruly when the party ends, and we wanted to make sure we got an auto before people got grabby or shove-y.

Getting an auto at 11:45 was annoying and we had some hilarity ensue, but we made it home for under 200 Rs.

Where I Work

2007-10-06T14:16:00.000+01:00

Sometimes I work at home:

And sometimes I work at GK in the IT building:

Wait--It's not like that at all

2007-10-03T09:06:00.000+01:00

I reviewed my entries, and it seems I paint a more negative picture of Bangalore than I intended. I try to focus on things that differ from the US, and a lot of times it's some saga about how something I don't even think about at home takes four extra people and six repetitions (Internet, DHL delivery, auto drivers).
India has plenty of interesting things that are non-logistical.

The Garden City
Bangalore has loads of parks. So, even though the streets are crammed with traffic, a small (or huge, in the case of Cubbon Park and Lal Bagh Gardens) meticulously maintained park will be within a few blocks. Also, the landscaping here is all giant versions of US houseplants, huge, beautiful old trees, and lots of flowering trees. The jasmine smells nice at night.

Family Friendly
Evening are nice around the condo because the families come out. The kids get home from school around 3-4 PM. From that point on, the complex sounds like a playground (because it is one). Neighbors come out to chat, retirees walk the path around the compound--it's all very neighborhoodsy. Monday night I worked out near the main courtyard (turns out the Club House *doesn't* open at 6) and got to watch people while I jumped rope. Several little kids came over to watch the nutty foreign lady doing push-ups and lunges, but they got a bit shy when I said hello.
My workout got relocated when the groundskeeper came out and sprayed big clouds of pesticides everywhere. No mosquitoes in my lungs--guaranteed. Later in the evening, people gather in the clubhouse to play ping-pong, badminton (known here as shuttlecock), snooker, and other games.

Please--Do Not Trouble Yourself
People here are gracious and welcoming. They will invite you into their homes, answer questions on the street, and if you ask them about a topic, odds are the person will offer to get or do whatever you need. I hesitate to ask people for things because I don't want to trouble them, and--selfishly--I know that it's usually going to be an ordeal in terms of coordination and communication. The only phrase I can find that works is "Please--do not trouble yourself," which works sometimes.

We met one of our neighbors from our floor in the elevator. She immediately invited us in, told us about her job, invited us to dinner at their place (she has three roommates), and gave us advice on autos. We haven't met the other roommates, but all four girls work for the same big consulting firm I worked at out of college.

For Indians coming to the United States--especially Seattle--we must seem terribly cold, paranoid, and impatient. I admit that I prefer my culture because I can do more things alone than with others, but it's nice to see people be friendly. I am better at helping than being helped (and I mean that in a practical way, not in the I'm-so-great-and-have-such-a-big-heart way), but I'll probably never come close to Indian hospitality.

KR City Market

2007-10-03T06:09:00.000+01:00

I realized that the fancy department store is probably not nearly as interesting for to read about as the City Market.

The City Market is several blocks' worth of shops and stalls. I didn't see any foreigners there, except for one on the outskirts as I was walking out. Lack of foreigners is nice because it means fewer beggars and scams (though in tourist areas, I have the advantage of offers to have my name written on a grain of rice).

It was good to wander around, but I'm a pretty big marketing target since virtually all foreigners are rich (yes, backpackers, you are rich here, too). I didn't actually buy anything--the household goods were not of the same quality I buy (thin "stainless" steel, etc); the clothes were too small; and for jewelry and saris, I need to shop with a local. Any sari I ask about is "10,000 Rupees, madam." I certainly don't mind paying a bit of a foreigner tax, but it can get pretty ridiculous.

Pictures say a thousand words (and I have to get back to work):

At Home, I'd Probably Get Arrested

2007-10-01T17:13:00.000+01:00

After a good morning at GK on Saturday, I spent the afternoon wandering around one of the nicer neighborhoods between GK and where I live. I shopped a bit (bought a pillow and some clothespins: 150 Rs), and then I snapped pictures of cars, signs, houses, gas stations--whatever. If I had been an obvious (i.e. different skin) foreigner in the US walking around taking pictures of a neighborhood, I think I'd end up making acquaintances at Homeland Security.

Shop 'til You Drop
I didn't really drop, though your feet get a little tired. The streets and sidewalks are uneven (at best), and often I pick my way through puddles, dirt, mud, and poop (lots of cattle and dogs wander around). It sounds worse than it really is. You get used to it, and you take your shoes off before you go into a lot of places. I also use the bathroom sprayer to wash my feet when I get home.

I try to figure out what is "Expensive" and what is reasonable. My conclusion: if it's good quality and I want it enough: buy it. I don't have good points of reference (though if there's haggling involved, I try to spy on locals). I can't really use "what does a loaf a bread go for?" because food prices vary wildly. I spent 15 Rs on a thali for lunch, but going out with some ex-pats the same night night cost me 2500 Rs because I drank and snacked at fancy hotel bars where a lot of ex-pats (and their corporate accounts) cluster. So, I try to compare prices, cross my fingers, and hope I'm not paying too much of a foreigner price. [Side note: TP costs A DOLLAR A ROLL.]

What's Kannada for "Where's the Big and Tall Section?"
On Sunday, I went to the City Market, a big, fancy department store, and had a series of annoying auto-driver experiences exacerbated by low blood sugar and diesel fumes. Other than the last bit, the city market was interesting and fun to wander around in. I saw a dog so ugly, I didn't have the heart to photograph it.

Shopping at the department store was a little like shopping in high school, where I was bigger than most girls and couldn't find clothes that fit right. I tried on t-shirts, pants, and blouses--all of which were too small, but the next size up was Huge. I looked at bras, but they had nothing larger than a 32, which would never make it around my rib cage, let alone anything else. Underwear seemed like a possibility, but I have plenty here. Jeans are almost as expensive as they are at home, and the quality isn't as good. So, I'll just have to call my friend's tailor and get something custom-made. Oh. Darn.

The departments stores are multi-story, air-conditioned, pop music-filled, and generally about the same as a US department store. The difference is that one or two clerks hover and suggest things for me. And the they watch closely while I pick up shirts. And maybe suggest the same shirt. Or another shirt completely unlike anything I had picked up. Or the same shirt that I had been looking at and hadn't picked up because it was clearly too small and I would have split the arms. And then the second clerk will do the same. And maybe a third.

Even though the hovering makes sense (when labor is cheap, you can hire a lot of staff, and that staff is eager to please so as to not lose the job), it's still off-putting (you can probably read 3000 blog entries across the interwebs about this very phenomenon).

Fried Starch-Stuffed Starch? Genius!

I finally (after failed attempts to eat at smaller, less fancy places)lunched at an Indian Chinese restaurant in a hotel near MG Road (possibly my last trip there. Too many damned tourists). I had some sort of fried potato in sweet chili sauce. The potatoes were mashed with garlic and spices, wrapped in something that may have been another sheet of potato and then fried. I could do a whole blog entry on Indian Chinese food, but the key points are: a) TASTY, b) waaaaaaaay better than American Chinese food, 3)distinct from Chinese-Chinese food, and 4) TASTY!

Five points if you guess who this ad reminds me of!

2007-10-01T16:58:00.000+01:00

(Hint: She's in jury duty right now!)

Don't Worry, Neill--The Cat Will Protect You

2007-09-28T13:48:00.001+01:00

These bats are likely fruit bats, and they're actually probably larger than Neill's Die Fledermaus-ing Mia. Liz took a photo of these in the park near the Bull Temple.

The bull is really big, carved out of a single white boulder, and oiled monthly with peanut oil to keep it black. It's also looks kinda wall-eyed and freaked-out. Liz and I were bemused at the underwhelmingness of this "Must-See" Bangalore landmark recommended by the travel guides. But, we had a nice stroll and a good dosa lunch in the Basavanagudi neighborhood.

WTF--Where's my Gmail?

2007-09-27T17:03:00.000+01:00

The ISP we use--AirTel--seems to randomly block sites. They are allowed again after a while. Right now, I can't check gmail. Earlier, I couldn't reach Cute Overload. Liz and I had trouble one morning reaching the websites of software development firms, which is rough since finding them is part of our jobs.

Dear Aliya: Bring Me WD-40
On the bright side, my cough is clearing up, and I have been able to exercise the past two days. The workout room has several pieces of equipment, all of which make a LOT of squeaks and creaks when used. Also, I'm afraid my powerful physique--in that I weight more than 90 pounds--may destroy some of the machines (Liz actually pushed a treadmill instrument panel through its frame by pressing START). Last night I didn't think to bring an iPod (I have no problem working out without music). BIG MISTAKE. I tried five pieces of equipment before finding an exercycle that didn't make me cringe. Also, none of the 22 recognized languages of India have a word for "ergonomics."

Tonight's Lesson: The treadmill power sources shut off after 20 minutes and have to rest for 10.

I don't like using exercise equipment much anyway, and after 10 years of training, I know enough exhausting drills to keep myself out of breath. Plus, I am certain all my pants will keep fitting me because the laundry service doesn't use dryers and they scrub and wring the hell out of clothing.

Infrequently Asked Questions

2007-09-26T16:52:00.000+01:00

To answer the Senator from Licton Springs:

Liz got to be my roommate because she's here around the same time I am, though she leaves India after I do. Also, she got here a week earlier and found the place.

The oddest thing I have smelled so far? That's tough. India never really smells odd, so much as intense. Today I smelled lemongrass. I can smell coffee roasting from my living room. Lots of men wear cologne here. The elevators are sometimes stincky, and I frequently smell weird, but I can't think of anything odd. Generally speaking, India has more good smells than bad. I could do without the diesel and urine (the latter is less present here than in downtown Seattle), but the jasmine smells lovely at night, and you get lots of wafts of breads cooking. Liz input: garbage piles, and I have to agree. They can be quite stinky.

Strangest thing I have seen was the SECOND Mystery Spot bumper sticker! The white guy on a motorcycle I saw today was pretty strange, though (and, no, not just fair. he was of Western descent). Honorable mention: the socket in my shower where the bathroom fan plugs in.

What food am I loving? ALMOST ALL OF IT AS FREQUENTLY AS POSSIBLE. I really like getting chats at stand-up places. Again--pictures forthcoming. I--like almost everyone--like panipuri. Brittens are tasty. I like getting South Indian food. I like North Indian Food. Indian Chinese is excellent. Hot chips. Breads. Tiny bananas. I'm a little tired of sambar, but other than that, BRING IT ON!

Jiggle It All You Like--It Won't help

2007-09-25T15:44:00.000+01:00

On the evening errand walk, we saw a health club. Everything looked 24-Hour Fitness, until we noticed a guy attempting to shake off the flab with one of those fat belt machines. He had it strapped across his butt. The machine *did* appear to be getting quite a workout.

Uh--any questions?

2007-09-25T13:16:00.000+01:00

So, at this point, I don't know how much I have to share. Unlike a tourist, I don't do exciting things every few days. I have two types of days:

Work at GK Day (2-3 days a week)
- wake up somewhere between 7 and 8
- open drapes, windows, and balcony doors to air out house
- Get up and make breakfast (If I don't eat enough, I end up throwing up the malaria pill)
- do dishes
- get dressed, check email, post a blog
- leave to get to GK between 8:15 and 8:45
- take 40-60 minute auto ride to GK
- find a spot at GK, work for a few hours, have a meeting, maybe have lunch, more work.
- leave GK between 4-5 PM
- 30-40 minutes auto ride home
- maybe walk neighborhood to pick up groceries, get snack, etc
- 6:30-8:30 prepare & consume dinner/leftovers with Liz, work on email, and watch TV
- Seattle starts waking up and sending email.
- 8:30-11 or 12 AM phone meetings with Seattle, emails, work.
- somewhere between 10 and 1, shower, floss, brush, and read a bit. Sleep.

Work from Home
- same as above, but I stay home all day, stopping to have lunch, make tea, and snack.

Once every few weeks (like yesterday) I may go into the city in the afternoon to meet with potential Mifos Specialists (companies who want to work for MFI's to deploy Mifos for them) or Mifos Developers (companies GTC would contract to build parts of Mifos). After the meetings, I might run errands or wander around MG Road (making sure to leave in time to beat some of the traffic). Once I get well, I'll probably throw in a workout in the morning.

All in all, it's a lot like my life in Seattle, except I eat breakfast here.

So, if you have any specific questions, it would be good to have them.